License To Kill

well here I am in my room here in my cousin's house... Trying to read and review.. so far I dont have a job yet besides baby sitting my niece and nephew... and I stopped finding one since I need to accomplish my changed goals.. yes changed because my first plan is just going here get any kind of job support my family wait for the airforce then finish my 4years in airforce then finally be a licensed nurse.

But when I got here, everything changed... My plans and my goals. It seems that my destiny or something is leading me somewhere I dont know exactly where and why. I have a lot of questions like if this is just a test of how will I respond to changes that come my way or God is just leading me to the right path for me... It is really confusing.

I've talked to my mom about my plans and she's very supportive so I didnt have problems with her. All of the people here is forcing me to get the RN license as soon as possible but hey! I'm not prepared for that its too soon, I got really scared when they talked to me about it besides I don't have that money yet and it will take a longer time for me to wait for the license. So i decided to take the LPN exam first.. yeah Licensed Practical Nurse... and the people here (relatives) are giving me feedbacks like.. "What? why dont you take the Rn first so u will not be wasting money and besides you graduated nursing that's y you should go for the RN''. Thanks to my very supportive BF for motivating me. Love lOve!

As if everything is that easy... I need to go back to my lessons since I reviewed for the airforce just last month... Besides as much as possible I want to use my own money in taking the exam so that nobody will say that "Naku sayang lang pera ko sa pagaaksaya sa test na yan". I know I should think positive, I'm always the one whose telling my friends to be positive with everything and always look to the brighter side. Here I am scared as hell to face failures.

"I'm not Afraid to be Afraid" yeah right. Someday. I only have 2weeks or more to review for my LPN exam isn't that great?? realistic right? oh well Im a genius. GENIUS. (yeah right) Actually i dont have plans to let you guys know but hey I dont have to be scared of what might people think of me or what people might see me as a person. I am who I am and If I will fail, I will fail but that's because I did not do well and not because I dont have the guts to do it. Right?

Besides, I am still lucky. Lucky because I don't need to have problems going in or out of the US which most of my co-nurses major problem in the Philippines. Lucky because I still have few relatives who are being supportive to my plans.

There's a saying that "you can't have everything" Somethings are not that easy to get.

Thank God someone lend me a laptop.. yeah kewl! I can use it for 2months so I can peacefully review here in my room. Thanks to my Cousin's wife co-worker for lending me this laptop.

That's all so guys wish me luck to my adventures!

P.S: We are going to New York tomorrow!!!!!!! yeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I am so EXCITED!