Dramatic Pinay

Do you sometimes feel the same thing like deep sadness come rushing to your heart like you just want to cry and let it out? Well here it goes again and again... this thing happens to me like every 2 months... depression attack or should I say "missing my family" attack haha... I was reading some pages of my books when I suddenly heard someone calling me from downstairs, exactly the way how my MOm would call me... "cheng" i heard it three times... the first one gave me the impression that my mom was actually calling me but after a couple of milliseconds i realized i was not with them and there's no way that my mom would be here... then everything cleared up... My aunt was calling somebody and she was calling "beng" or what other name...

Now that hit me so bad.. i mean I really miss the way how things go in our house everyday... how my mom would check up on me if I was already home... or when I hear my lil brother open the door coming home from school or when my stepfather would stompt his feet before entering the house to remove the dirt in his shoes. I miss every detail...

I miss how I stay in bed sleeping for 16 hours and my mom will knock on my door saying... "cheng are you still alive?" hahaha well those were the days...

America will make you feel old. It gives you a routine that it's hard for you to get out from it... (This is just my opinion okay?). I love the things that it gives me. I love the pleasures but the pleasures are quick. Not everything is easy here... as most of my old fellow countrymen would think. I love the surroundings but i hate the fact that I can't even share it with people i love.. maybe not for now. I love how the season change, it gives you a lot of new beginnings... i hate the fact that I don't know how to start changing everything...

I'm still lucky, Lucky to have a simple life and having these important people around me and still have reasons to come back home...

6 months and counting

I WANT TO WRITE A BLOG BUT I DON"T KNOW HOW TO START... hahahahha well I guess that's a start...Maybe I'll just list some of my random thoughts for today...

1. I need to enroll to a BLS program
2. Another Decision to make... actually its already made... hahaha
3. I'm scared to Die.
4. Will my boobs get bigger if I got pregnant? ahahhaha
5. I miss everyone back home.

I'm having a lot of fun in youtube lately hahha lots of interesting video blogs lol.

My New Toy

weeeee! I completed the set.. not really but ALMOST ahahaha... wheeewwww.... at least it's something that I really worked hard for... supposed to be a laptop but i decided to get this one first so I can take a lot of nice pictures in my niece birthday! I'll be the photographer in charge... LOL

Obviously I don't know how to use it yet but eventually there's gonna be progress hahaha... a new phone and my new camera.. all the overtime is worth it... hahahah

Well I'll spend a lot on gadgets rather than clothes... the sad thing is I don't have my mahal or my friends to share the happiness with... it's really a lot more different before... but yeah.. another blessing...

mY bOOKS FIRST...! Review Review Review.. ayt!

Yoga Craze

okay for the first time i tried something new, Yesterday I went to work for overtime but went home early because there's no work that morning so I decided to go home and do something else instead... hhaha then I saw the Wii Fit so I said why not try? hahaha the kids are not there so nobody's gonna bother me... hahahaha

So i tried a lot of different stuffs hahaha but I focused more on balance games because i think that's my weakness... the Yoga thing is really cool haha but the bad part is, i didn't had any warm up at all... so this morning when I woke up all my muscles hurt so bad! as in! waaaaaa...

well bye bye for now...

Bye Bye Na.... but yeah see you again?

well goodbyes are always sad but sometimes you have to think about the positive side why it happens... I don't want to sound really dramatic but yeah I hate when people leave. One friend told me that I am so unfair because Its okay for me to leave people behind other than seeing people leave.

What I love about Airports is first, Somebody special is coming or second, your leaving for a vacation trip.

Gemoy left CT last sunday morning to go live in Tampa, Florida for good (i guess) which I think is a best decision for her but I felt really sad I even had some crying moments the day before she left. We grew up together, shared friends, have same interests.

I don't want to blame anybody for her decision not to stay here because I know things happen for a reason and maybe sometimes it has to be not so good to place you in a much better destination...

It's not a forever goodbye thing but It's more of a Goodbye-for-now thing... "I might" move in to Florida too... the pictures that gemoy sent are really interesting... I love that the apartment got a swimming pool and i love the kitchen, the room and the couch ahahha and I LOVE HOT WEATHER! im so Over and done with this super cold season it's making me lazy! but the thing is when I make big decisions i have to think about my family first... and things are not as easy for me because I support my family and they can be affected if things won't turn the way we want it if i move.

and I was thinking about my things hahahaha I know all of this won't fit in two bags and it will cost me a lot! but yeah Im thinking about moving... it's time for me to be MORE independent. lol

well my 2 days off were quite alarming... hahah i haven't read any of my books and I didn't go to my review class last sunday coz it's snowing so hard... well I know everything's gonna be okay... I slept all day long today hahahaha....

I cleaned my closet last sunday and i was surprised how many clothes i have that still have TAGS on it. hahaha That's what I discovered about myself recently when I really like something like a shirt or a dress it comes to the point that I don't even wanna wear it. I don't know if other girls are the same but yeah it's like the occasion needs to be really important or special for me to wear them ahahhaha lol.


Oh well for sure I'm gonna sleep really late today coz i had a lot of sleep the whole day...

The best Job in the world

still can't get enough of the article I read on yahoo news 2 days ago. An Australian state is offering a job that pays you 105,000 US dollars for 6 months staying on a nice island with free food and shelter.

For more info click this link: Best Job in The World

well I would love to apply to the said job for doing what? act as a caretaker of a beautiful paradise free food and everything do some weekly blogs for the public about the island. Take pictures, go snorkeling and a lot of stuffs! and when you're done with the job you got $105k wow....

So guys we should try to apply hahaha check out the link and follow the site there where you can apply plus you can upload videos for application!

what's keepin me working

haiiiz the day ended fast today at work! 3 days more! well because I found a new way to escape reality and that's through my imagination ahhaha lol really it helps! in my kind of job you don't really need to put a lot of concentration that's why I can still manage to daydream and work as well... hhahaha

well the more powerful the daydream, the better! so what I do is imagine that I'm on my way back to philippines to have a month of vacation, and there time runs so fast! hahahaha it really helps... or I think about all the dilemmas that I need to be worried about like what if I fail? (knock on wood) what if my papers will not be processed and my cgfns application expired? what's my plan B?

Everything that I need to set or plan happens in my 12 hour shift... multi tasking... hahaha well if i can only bring my book and read it if we don't have any job to run I would probably do it.

So far, I'm still waiting. My world is like in a PAUSE mode.

I didn't had any class last sunday due to the bad weather and hopefully I will have one this sunday! for now... work work work work work.

I got this quote on my cup of coffee... and i liked it.

"I used to feel so alone in the city. All those gazillions of people and then me at the outside. Because how do you meet a new person? I was very stumped by this for so many years. and then I realized, you just say, "Hi". they may ignore you or you may marry them and that possiblity is worth that one word."

ES TI AR E ES ES

Stress is always useless... "We get stressed because it makes us feel as though 'we're on top of things'. We get worried if we're not stressed, as though we've missed something. We worry and worry because we think 'we're on the case'. But in reality, it would be more beneficial to be in that calm state of mind we love, when approaching a challenging task. You may think that's ridiculous. But think about it; you’re under mass pressure, what will work more: approaching the task mega stressed, or - imagining - (note that word) that everything is OK and possible (even if it isn't). This, oddly, works wonders. Go for a run often too, you'll be amazed as to what it does - even to those who are depressed."

worth a post ^_^

T-Mobile G1 and iPod touch: The ultimate digital duo?

T-Mobile G1 and iPod touch: The ultimate digital duo?

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LOVE at first sight

wooot at last I have extra time to blog today! I'm having difficulty in balancing my time for a couple of days now.. super duper bUsy! as in... well what's new? I had my first day of class in my review last SUNDAY and it was a very interesting day. We are like 17 students who enrolled in the same class... And i think I'm the youngest lolz. It was a great day and I'm looking forward for the next class...

Super OVERTIME! yeah. 12 hours everyday... my 6th day tomorrow! lol working my ass out to buy a new laptop! lol hahahahaha (SONY VAIO PINK)

we went to best buy last week to check it out on how much is the total price and if they do Layaway. Unfortunately they don't have layaway plan for laptops and digital cameras. What sucks? The laptop is on sale for like a hundred bucks off!!!! but it will end this weekend which means I can't buy it. And even I have the money that night they ran out of stock!!! LUCKY HUH? But yeah so far this is the only thing that I want so bad that it came to the point that I really put so much effort just for me to be able to buy it. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. 1 to 2 more weeks.

I found her. What a Small World.

Okay, 1st this is a really tiring day. As soon as I got home I went straight to bed... I woke up around midnight coz my tummy really hurts and it needs something to digest. hahah lol. I didn't even had the chance to talk to my mom on the phone or even with my mahal coz I was really tired. oh well.

I logged in my facebook account yesterday and was surprised with a message coming from a stranger asking me if I am Rosedale Pickering and If I am her classmate back in Highschool. From there I knew who she was talking about, which is my big sister. yeah Big Sister. I already met 2 random people who knows my sister and recognize my name and asked me if I'm related to her.

I only know her by name, and that my middle name was named after her (obviously). i don't even know how she looks like ( but now I do) or if she knew that she have a little sister. lol

My kuya rodney is really lucky because he had the chance to meet his two lil sisters lol. I don't know if its destiny or what.

I recently met my brother (kuya rodney) when I moved here in CT, which is I think is a good thing because out of 50 states it's almost imposible for us to ever meet but God made it happen...

3 siblings, 3 different moms. My powerful Dad lol. hahah My Kuya's Mom name is Susan, My Mom's Name is Susan and my Dad named me SUSAN. now that's crazy. hahah What's with Susan huh dad? hahha lol

Okay so this person in my facebook told me that she recently talked to my sister in friendster, so I was curious and tried to search for her because I don't really have any idea how she looks like who knows maybe we bump into each other before.

Luckily i found her profile and actually saw her pictures there Thank God her profile was not set to private! I felt weird lol. I dunno. I don't know how to react but yeah finally...

I think she's living somewhere in New York or back in new Jersey.

Did I message her? nope. I just don't know what to say. ahahaahhaha

oh well papel...

woooot excited for my classes at last tuloy na!!! anyways too tired to blog maybe tomorrow! hahaha lol... this is a hell of a week toinkz.