my 2010!

woah 2010 has been very good to me in terms achieving my goals :) I've been very very blessed and I couldn't ask for more... I have new sets of goals for this year and I'm really hoping I could achieve everything as well! 2009 was full of struggles and this year was a big relief! I mean really big RELIEF! 

Sad part bout this year is I lost so many precious people... I know that they're in a better place now but I just wish they didn't had to go yet... I don't want to lose anybody anymore at least for the next 50 years? i mean when I'm dead or when I'm way too old to remember! 

Oh well how wasa your christmas guys?

mine was ok, i mean I get to be with my boyfriend and cousins! plus my cousin that I haven't seen for almost ten years visited us! weeee that was real fun to catch up and all wish we had more time but they had to leave the next day... and also I got what i wanted for christmas :) I wish home wasn't too far :( I miss Christmas in the Philippines! 

I want to Thank God for a very blessed year and for taking good care of my family and always watching over them... also for a very healthy year and a very good relationship with my  boyfriend love him to death!

Till death do us part

It was my 2nd day of duty, I was working in a long term care facility and have couple of patients assigned to me… as I was doing my med pass, i was looking for one of my patient and I couldn’t find her anywhere… so I asked the CNA where she is and they said prolly in her husband room. So this lady is about on her 70s and I look at my list of patients and looked for the same last name and went straight to that room and found her there with her husband. She’s ambulating via wheelchair as well as her husband. I gave both their meds and I saw how caring they are for each other. 

Every time i have my duty I would see the lady always go to her husband’s room (she’s more healthier) until one day the administrator decided to put them in the same room. They become one of my favorites I just love seeing a love so true and lasting. 

One time I was asking the wife if she wanted to eat in the dining area since she’s more stronger than the guy and can ambulate without issues through her wheelchair, right away she would turn to her husband and ask him “are you going too?” the husband answered he’ll just stay in his room since he’s a little tired. She faced towards me and said “oh I’m not going cause my husband’s don’t want to come, I’ll just stay here with him”

Every time the husband would cough she would look at him with a very worried face and come to him closer just to rub his back… Or sometimes when I’m getting their vital signs I would hear them talk to each other and joke around…

Love never really fades… it’s up to the couple how to work their relationship out through all those years… and also stick to their vows of marriage <3

“from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part”

hey I'm on tumblr :)

prettyrosedale.tumblr.com

Moving Out. AGAIN :)

This is going to be my fourth home! Soon to have a permanent address! (at least for another year ) lol
Been very busy for the past 2 weeks looking for an apartment/condo unit I didn't expect it to be hard but it was! Especially because of the time frame and also considering the budget but we still managed to find one that fits the budget and also in a good location near our jobs! It's a condo unit with two bedrooms. I'm really excited and scared at the same time. It's the first time I would be "living-in" with a boyfriend in the same house but at least my cousin would be there too so that would help relieve the pressure on the relationship.
I'm excited coz my cousin is coming back here! :) It's kinda selfish but I am really happy.

I'm freaking out about the cooking part! save me! I don't know how to cook besides breakfast :/ lol

Anyway this is going to test how responsible or irresponsible i can be...

It was fun looking for stuffs to buy for the house tho. If only I have the money! We found a lot of cheap furniture too!

Anyways until now I haven't packed my things yet because of work and hectic schedule! hopefully tom I could set some things up to be ready to carry out the house in to the car and finally by wednesday everything should be ready!

P.S thanks to kuya jay for helping me out :)

Eminem - Love The Way You Lie ft. Rihanna

This is by far my most favorite song of Eminem.. I can feel all the emotions in the lyrics. I just don't like the first kissing scene on the video, hmmmm... Oh well. I waited weeks for the premier of the music video and finally it's out!

thoughts

It seems my life stopped @ 20. it's like my whole world stopped and I live to work. Yeah welcome to adulthood right? maybe if Philippines isn't such a poor country or maybe if my family wasn't poor I'll be happy to stay there and I would never had to leave...

You know how hard it is to make friends here? You meet racist people, you meet people who only wants to hang out with the same color as them or same race, you meet those two faced people and you meet people who's only friends with you when you're at work or some sort. It's hard to make friends because you hardly have time to socialize coz you're all working.

In the philippines, anywhere you can make friends. We don't believe in the saying "That's too personal" we'll ask anything in this world without hesitations, we'll even ask how much you make in a month or any personal questions. Things like that we don't care. hahaha I think we are more laid back people and we love making friends, forming groups. In school or at work for sure you know everybody's cellphone number. It's easy to know people and easy to hangout. There's a lot of down side on this things but the point is life never gets boring and you'll never feel alone.

I miss those days when you wake up and you have 100+ good morning text messages. Or when it's a holiday or when there's something special going on. Back then, i cant live without a cellphone, here I can't live without internet! that's my only connection to my friends back home...

Here, you have to watch out for everything and be careful on what you can and can't say.

anyways, I just miss home... and i've been missing home for the longest time... I'm just lucky to have the boyfriend. He's one of the reason that I'm sill here and not feeling lonely... He keeps me happy :)


Overall life is still good... just missing my friends :/

I need to update

been wanting to blog for a long time but way too busy to do so. Work, then applying for a Nursing job and a lot of stuffs going on.

Me and my love went to movies last 07-23-10 to watch "Inception" for our 11 month date, guess who we saw? his ex! hahaha for the first time. It was kinda awkward because i had no idea it was her until my bheb told me. oh well.

Then last saturday we went to the Carnival in New Hartland it was fun! it reminded me of the carnivals back home. Pretty much the same concept but honestly we have more fun stuffs on our carnivals back home than here... more food choices, more rides and it's open till daylight! hhahaha. We went to Debbie's house (jose's friend) I had fun and everybody was nice! i had few smirnoffs.. just wish I wasn't tired that night prolly we could have stayed longer but i worked 12 hours and my body is complaining already...

On the other hand, Ate analyn is in the Philippines right now with her hubby and I really miss her. Work is boring without her... :( i don't have anybody to share my lunch with or my cookies or tell stories to so the time would run faster. Oh well she'll be there for 2 more weeks...

Right now. I'm trying to find a Job that I have been wanting to have for a long time but this economy sucks way too much that it's soooo hard to find one especially on my case not having any experience! grrr...

I have to be patient again :) oh well i have sooo much more to say but I'm too tired to blog so prollyy tom :) I need to update my blog more often anyway...

Grey's anatomy is keeping me busy this past few weeks and I'm loving it!

P.S making my blogs and pictures on public mode for couple of weeks... multiply is getting dry... and it sucks!

I got you! :)

ok! this blog has been on my draft for a long time and i figured I needed to give justice and make a little changes and finally post it!

I know it's a little late and prolly you guys are tired of me bragging about passing my NCLEX RN exam but let's face it's not a very easy experience and I waited long enough to achieve this and been dreaming of the moment when I can finally share my story, my struggles and finally the success I've been waiting for.

Some people won't have the guts to admit how many times they really took it, and I admire those people who don't care about what people would think about them or don't care if people will judge them.

Nclex is not easy. Nothing is easy. The first time I didn't make it I was depressed for months, I don't even want to see my books, i don't even want to talk about it. I got mad. I blamed everybody, I blamed myself for not doing my best for thinking I never failed anything why would i fail this one? and then it happened and I got devastated, i felt all the money I spent and worked hard for, all went straight to trash.

I was embarrassed. I felt down. I got paranoid. I felt maybe I'm stupid? or dumb. I felt all the negative emotions. Then months passed i realized, wait. I am not going to get old and die not having a license, I worked hard for 4 years and I'm not giving up on this one! lol.

If I survived Sir Corpus(prof in NCM 104) Maam Weandy, Sir Manio (Prof in Pharmacology), and all those major subjects not mentioned, I'll survive anything! lol

I went back to my books, saved money and searched for a good review that would help me.

KAPLAN- practice questions were good but lack of content in my opinion. When I attended the class they just read questions and explained how they got the answer but no formal Med Surg on actual class. (didn't go through all my online review so i don't know that part) lol

Books: Saunders Comprehensive review.- I love the CD! but I suck at reading books just few pages you'll see me starting to fall asleep! So what I did was I answer questions then if I have questions I go to the book.

Mosby's Pharmacology Memory Note Cards : the best Pharmacology book I have ever had! I'm a visual learner and this books contains drawings, colors, and some comic type stories that's fun and very helpful for me to remember side effects and indications! If you're a visual learner you have to have this!

RN notes clinical pocket guide: a very tiny book that you could bring anywhere if you need to scan or try to memorize labs or some simple procedures.

HURST REVIEW (ONLINE): I owe it to them Big time! they have sets of handouts which you can print per topic or if you want the whole book itself. I prefer printing it topic per topic. You know why? Coz when I print the whole thing and I see it it seems so much for me to study all those stuffs. I printed it topic per topic at the end I was amazed how much pages I read and finish without even realizing it.

Iphone/Pod application (saunders): it's everywhere with me. When I don't have nothing to do and don't have my books with me I answer questions!

Feuer and Kaplan Audio: I listen to them while at work (Saturdays). Thanks to my super duper nice Supervisor letting me review while working :) i listen to them OVER and OVER!

ALLNURSES.com a super helpful forum for people like me, I got so much info's from that site and answered questions!

So now, I need to wait for my endorsement to finally be over and get my license for Connecticut since I have NY license. Another waiting process but hey! I waited 2 years what's few more weeks?

All the missed parties, gimiks, and outings are worth it! finally I can do stuffs that I have been wanting to do for a long time but I don't have time! Photography, blogging, pictorials, videos.

Super thanks to everybody that lighted candles and prayed for this success. It's worth it.

Dear John

so I've been wanting to watch Dear John for a long time and finally last night me and my cousin rented it. The first part of the story was so good and also the drama part about the dad it made me cry. I also love the location and stuff. Then the end part was not what I'm expecting at all! it's kinda shocking and disappointing. They could have made it better but overall it's not that bad... Good thing I didn't watch it at the theater coz I would've been really disappointed.

oh well, anyways life is good and everything's fine! praying praying praying!

Let's talk about LOVE.

Some love are naturally perfect, Some you have to work hard to make it perfect...

I fell in love so many times before, sometimes with the same person over and over again...and from those I learned so many lessons, earned so many heartaches too.

Sometimes you ask life so many questions like why cupid is unfair? You fall in love with a person that doesn't love you back or you can't love somebody who love you enough.

Things happen like you love each other so much but you can't be together because there's a lot of people involved that might get hurt if you decide to be together or you fell in love with the same sex and things got so complicated (generally speaking).

Why can't it be just You love him, He loves you. That's it. No complications. No heartaches.

Well I think that's the main challenge of love. Overcome all trials... work hard to make it happen and make it go on and on.

How bout soul mates? yes. I do believe I have a soul mate. I did found him, I believed from the very first time in my life that it's really is true. You really have this person that comes in your life and everything seems to be perfect. Like you fall in love everyday you see him. You feel those butterflies in your stomach whenever you imagine him, his kiss, his touch, his voice. Then suddenly in the end, the devil makes you doubt it. makes you think if this is real? No. it's too perfect to be real. Then you get scared. You get weak and then temptation sinks in then you just realized you got sucked in and you ruined everything.

You try fixing it. But as the old saying says when you break the trust you can't have it back anymore the way it was like a crumpled paper. There's this thought that it's never perfect anymore and it's not gonna be perfect no matter what you do. You come to think he doesn't deserve you anymore.

That's when you realize you have to move on. You have to let it go. Even how much it will hurt you.

They say it takes a full year or more to move on. Why? because of all the holidays, the dates and all the celebration. I believe when love is great it never lose a place in your heart.

Me? I find somebody to help me move on. In a way your using that person but if he loves you, it's fair enough to give it a try and maybe he can heal your heart or I find somebody wanting to move on, so that we can move on together and make new memories together.

Some love are challenged by distance. Others by the past love of their loved ones trying to compete with the past. Whatever it is, always think that even a tiny bit reason to fight for it, DO it. Hold on as much as you can. Then when every single solution fails. You let go.

I'm a kind of person that's challenged with the past. That's my thing. I try to do everything and prove that I'm better, that I'm more worth pursuing and I'm lucky to be successful.

I learned a lot from the past long relationships and this relationship i have right now is worth fighting for. It has its ups and downs but everything work out in the end. He's amazing in so many ways and I never imagined he will turned out to be that guy I always wanted in my life. and I can say I'm finally letting go of all the past. They're just memories now. Lessons learned.

It's been almost a year now. Thank you Lord for giving me memorable relationships. I'm still working on my fairytale and my own happy ending.

9th Month <3

Happy 9 months bheb.. yay! time really fly so quick...

supposed to go to ihop this morning for our monthsary breakfast since my bheb got work today but by the time we got there it was so packed and decided to go to friendlys instead, then onas we're on our way there, we passed by Cheesecake factory, and we we have been planning to go there for a long time so we got really excited and decided to have breakfast there.

the food and smoothies were so good! super love it! I got a tiramisu cheesecake and it was alright, i think it's better if i got the strawberry one but whatever everything was perfect!

Last night, we had the chance to chill with eric since he put up a bonfire on their backyard.. it was actually nice and very calming.. I wish we were able to do this back home (Philippines) but there's no space since houses are built so close to each other...

For the past few weeks, I've been wanting to go home so bad... like really bad I always cry at night... good thing bheb always try to comfort me and make me feel better, i don't know how I'm going to survive loneliness if I didn't met him at all..

He made my life here a little easier and always try to cheer me up when I'm really down.. I miss everybody.. like EVERYBODY and EVERYTHING.

I don't have any choice but to deal with the loneliness.. I can't wait for that day to come that I could finally see everybody, hug them tight, laugh with them, do silly stuffs, reminisce moments, chill, smoke, drink, play cards... I even miss riding a jeepney or tricycle...

Oh well another day. I survived! lol

Again, HAPPY 9th Monthsary bheb... I'm happy I made you fall in love with me. :-)

The Last letter

I will get there...

Work work work... no time to study as usual... what keeps me busy nowadays is my bheb, my books and some blogs that always read from other sites which really helps me a lot and motivates me but FACEBOOK always ruins everything for me... it is just way too addicting... lol

I was scheduled to work today for overtime but since they sent us home early yesterday and usually most of the time I can't afford to waste my effort and wake up early only to go to work for 4 hours... when I can rest instead and actually enough time to study and do some chores...

I'm actually Losing hope about my nursing thing... it seems like time goes by faster each day and I just get lazier and lazier... I need some strong motivation... I always think of some sort of things I like and I want to do after I finally get over this review and finally hold that License...

I know, God have plans for me or for everyone in the whole wide word... that's the only reason i could think about.. Im sooo close... I just have to double or even triple my efforts and prayers... I can't wait for that day that I could actually say I'm finally a registered nurse.

After those 4 long years you go to school and those mean teachers and overnight group study and group projects? Oh well... I know everything will turn out to be just fine... :-)

On the other note, I miss my HOME! i miss everybody so much... I just want to say sorry for those people who constantly leaving messages on my YM if wasn't able to reply.. I'm just way too busy at work and studying... e-mail you guys pretty soon...

Does facebook ruin relationships?

yeah I got this as my status earlier... i had this conversation with my boyfriend and i really felt it bothered him so much when i was talking to my long lost friend back in elementary... My boyfriend was bothered because i was talking to a guy... and my bf is kinda the jealous type... and it was my fault because i didn't informed him about that conversation. It wasn't a big deal for me but i immediately think that what if he did the same thing and forgot to let me know? would i be upset? of course I will be!

So i tried to calm down and talk it out with him... tried to explain everything... I was a friendster fan way back HS and college... I'll never let a day pass without checking it just to see who viewed my profile and maybe who looked at my new uploaded pictures...

I never had a problem with my recent ex boyfriend about anything on friendster, not that I know of. Just because we are always together anyway... i guess i forgot about that and now still acting the way I was...

So me and my bf had a long talk about it and finally he understood my point of being far away from everybody and all my friends which i can only have conversations through facebook or chats...

Now I'm trying to put myself in his position and try to think before i do something because I don't really want to make him feel upset about anything and also i don't want to ruin what we already have just because of this small things thats bothering him.

I need to study anyway...

Long Week

yay! Happy Easter! If I didn't have to work tom. I would probably attend the mass but unfortunately, I need to work.

Tomorrow should be my day off til wednesday but like i said 7 more days til my day off! woah... Plus, tomorrow should be busy and really exhausting but i'll manage to survive...

I miss my bheb! no cuddling for a couple of days til our day off plus he will be transferred to a different shift, meaning we have lesser time together... :-(

But we should be happy and thankful if he finally got hired... it's really hard to find a job nowadays and this is just a challenge to our relationship... oh well. I'm kinda sleepy now but here's a whole lot pages of book to read!

why do you blog?

another day.. it's been a while since i last blogged.. i kinda missing
it so I'm writing one today..

i love to blog because its like giving me something to read in the future and make me remember what happened on these days of my life. It will also help me reflect if i had live a
good life or i had a lot to regret but either way I'm hoping it to be all good..

wishing that someday, like maybe few more years after, I'll be reading all this will
give a smile on my face rather than having all the regrets...

i love blogging i just dont have time to do it recently because of a lot of priorities that i need to be focused on.. blogging makes me a happy person too.. it makes me good at
telling stories and giving details on whats happening in my life.. it's more of a personal thing to read but I chose to make it public so maybe my readers could reflect on my experiences or relate to me in some way..
In my own personal view, it doesn't mean you have to make it private to be personal..

Blogging also helps me release stress and a big output of my ideas and whats
going on in my so called life.. but whatever ur reasons are for blogging either to make money or simply just make urself feel better by expressing urself. i personally think its very healthy on our emotional well being.. its like talking to somebody but you just want to feel that you've been heard by your friends or readers. i just love it! it sums up how i make decisions how i deal with circumstances and changes in my life and also makes a good source of evidence how my thinking matures overtime...

Happy 7th Month... <3

yep. happy 7th month my Love... I had so much fun earlier at the gym... we planned going to the gym around 6:30 am but since he can't wake me up coz i was sleeping like a baby.. i got up on my own around 10 then we had a super delicious breakfast @ iHop.. pancakes, eggs and sausage...

After that we decided to hit the gym around 11. We went to the whirlpool then to the Sauna then steam room then play around at the pool... it was our first time to go together swimming! It was actually fun!

Hello there Blog!

yup! I miss blogging...! like i really miss the times I used to write tons of blogs or at least one blog a day... I guess america is getting me real busy trying to make money for survival and no time to sit down and chit chat on my blog...

So far, this year is starting good... everything is going well... Been working my hours then some overtime... I worked for 11 days 12 hours shift! isn't it crazy? Well... I need to get something so might as well work hard for it...

Besides from work, love life is going good... sometimes he's being stubborn but I'm stubborn as well so we try to work it out lol. Never made efforts like this on my past but im loving it.

I have my four days off this week and I pretty much spent it with my bheb... Sunday, we visited rob and spent an hour with him and asked him hows life treating him over there. After that we went shopping @ westbrook and clinton then dinner at the chinese resto...

We bought the same shirt! lol for the first tme! hahahah so excited for our planned pictorial with bob but the weather is not very cooperative... news said it's gonna snow today but it didn't... Oh well winter is long so maybe next time we'll finally have a chance...

Still studying... i need to really do this but why can't I? lol I'm just so lazy... haiiizzz...
Been spending my days off SLEEPING... as in SLEEPING. both of us.

@ Work things are going crazy because besides the fact that work is getting busier and busier everyday there's a bunch of annoying people working there... People who don't mind their own business and keep their issues inside them. Gossips are crazy over there. Oh well I'm just worried about my friend about all of this, she can't really handle this kind of stress going on that's why it piss me off when people are trying to ruin everything and start making up stories. All i can do is try to support her and be at her side.

Overalll, life is life. bad things happen and you just have to try to hang on and do your best and always ask guidance from God in EVERY decision you make...

welcome 2010! (a late blog entry)

Wow another year has passed,
The highlight of my year? hmmmm what could it be?
a lot of things happened that i never imagined to even happen in my life, taste of failure and success... lost some people whom i valued and met new people that became a big part of my life for the past year...

First quarter of the month last year went so smooth, i got all the things that I wanted and bust my butt working to get it. Started the year going to review classes and all that stuff...

Second quarter was all work plus the not so effective studying that I did... really got so confident and didn't paid attention to things that i needed to be concentrating to...

Third quarter was chaos... failure. betrayal. Drama. Deception. heartache... but after all that? I learned a lot of lesson. Lessons that lead me to be very careful in every decision I make in my life...

Last quarter was fun.. get to have a sweet vacation.. New found love... Hope and forgiveness... There's some down part but not enough to end my year in vain or sadness..

I have so much to be thankful for to God... for all the blessings that he gave me... for a good life that I have right now... for giving me the people that bring about happiness and good memories. For true friendship, healthy family and for my Love... <3

I'm hoping for a better year... more happiness and contentment... Keep my family healthy and strong... and hopefully offer me my most awaited success... :-)