Love_Overdose

If you mess up, 'fess up.

2012-01-22T19:49:00.000-08:00

A lot of things scares me, and one of those is responsibility. When I am given a certain task that accompanies great responsibilities, it scares the hell out of me. I just feel like what if i mess up? what if I am not the right person? all negative things then i just try to convince myself everything's gonna be alright no matter what i just have to put my effort, i just have to get over that certain fear.

Well how about you? how do you cope? every person has their own way overcoming such instances. I think I am more braver than I thought I am.

Well everyday is a challenge especially at work. I can't still believe that my decisions are important, that doctors hear me out when i tell him suggestions about my patient or that somebody needs my signature bec they can't proceed without it. It's those mature stuffs that just freaks me out sometimes i feel like I am really OLD! lol

I think maybe because I'm such a goof, i fool around and joke all the time and im used to people not taking me seriously back home haha well it's a new life time to be more mature and professional.

Anyway seriousness aside, it was a great day today. Pariots win and will go to Superbowl. I think that's one thing that's "americanized" in me is watching football, i didn't watch sports back home because it's just plain boring for me but my cousin told me to start watching it and thought me bout the game. So i started watching it with him and got so into it but only when it's getting near the championship hahaha. i just want to be able to experience super bowl. The way I would described it, superbowl here is like Pacquiao having a fight where all filipinos try to watch and support him of course. It's nearly the same thing! Pretty much like a BEER DAY! wohoooo!

Oh well I'm runnign out of interesting things to say! hahaha i wasn't able to blog yesterday i fell asleep again for I am soooo tired! didn't even do grocery shopping and just went out to friendlys to eat with gemoy, we both had milshake and fried chicken with mashed potatoes and corn. Then went to the mall to get me a pair of gloves coz this cold weather sucks especially when im trying to clean up my car every snow fall.

PS. Thank BHEB for my Patriots JERSEY :) love you....

Titillate

2012-01-20T19:58:00.000-08:00

means "kinikilig" lol yun pala english word nun? ahhahaha... anyway i was watching the latest episode of my all time favorite series VAMPIRE DIARIES and i was titillating/kinikilig (oh my it doesn't sound right to me hahaha) in the scene where she told stephan that she kissed DAMON. you can see it on his face that he got hurt >.< *sigh* Elena is a lucky girl. lol

okay stop with the spoiler! hahaha if you haven't watch this series let me tell, go start watching it! it's not just about pure drama/love dilemma stuffs it's better that Twilight! lol

Among vampire shows, the thing that differs TVD from twilight, the story doesn't just center the leading lady, or the love team there's a lot of action going on and a lot of twists in the story that's really unexpected and unpredictable and of course i know movies is much limited so i can't really compare the two but if you love twilight, you'll definitely will like TVD, or if you hate twilight but love vampire stories and mysteries go watch TVD.!

on the other note, i had a good day at work today, we have a project right now for our clinic and I chose to participate since last year i wasn't able to bec i was just starting. I'm excited actually.

And I'm crossing my finger to get approved to go to Davita Academy which will be held in Dallas, Texas in March! this is a great opportunity. I am so thrilled! then next is Preceptor training in Brentwood, Tennessee. Maybe April? awwww... Then planning a getaway vacation with my love somewhere far!!! like i said i wish to go places this year. Just grabbing all opportunities while i still could.

anyway tom ill be in charge at the clinic so i need to get some good rest and pray that I'll have a smooth day tom.! also need to wake up early to maybe shovel if the snow gets bad this morning! I hope not! I can't afford to have anymore late punch ins. :p

Overtime

2012-01-19T20:38:00.001-08:00

I wwnt to work today instead of staying home for my off id rather keep myself busy than sleep all day until i get a headache oh how i hate that..

I was the charge nurse for a couple of hours and it was all good no issues all day, after that i was able to chart my monthly nursing notes then i went home after!

I finally got my pink controller! Oh how i love it! Hahaa took some pictures earlier with my game suit on! Yay! Soo bored since my bheb is trying to take nap.. I made chicken and then watched oth then played mw3 as usual.. Im getting better im actually enjoying the game now that i'm familiar with some of the maps..

Hhmm can't wait for my off.. Sunday please come soon! Excited for patriots and ravens game!!!

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Bloody and snowy day

2012-01-17T19:45:00.001-08:00

Oh my i was sooo tired yesterday that i wasn't able to blog, i guess i can skip a day ? I even fell asleep on the couch thats how tired i was, i was forced to do 12hrs shift since i had an incident at work, never celebrate 5 mins before u punch out bec something might happen!! Lol i was about to go home when one of my pt's access bled inside her car with her caregiver and husband, they were about to drive home when the caregiver called me and i had to run outside and check her, oh my! This poor little old lady bled like crazy it was blood all over so i put pressure and tried to grab her out the car to go inside the clinic and ofcourse even this old lady was so tiny she got some weight and have difficultly ambulating so we carried her out the car to go inside the clinic put pressure, saline bag and mann let me tell you, i showered with blood thank God i was still on my lab gown facemask but i didnt get to save my crocs and the lower part of my pants i look like i got shot, anyway in the end she was fine but had to go to ER for evaluation, thanks to old scrub suit we had i was able to change her clothes and my pants too! :) it was a crazy end of my day thanks for the help of my co workers.

After i got home we went to grab dinner at boston market since gemoy is craving chicken, i had bagels on my way home from work bec i was starving and can't wait anymore, i need something or ill pass out while driving, then after that we played modern warfare and we didnt even realize it was snowing outside!!! It was soooo pretty, it's my first snow fall this year :)

Today is my day off nothing special just watched one tree hill the whole day then brought dinner for bheb at work, and i had fast food too for dinner.

I made fried rice tho for tom :)

Tell me it looks good! Lol

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Location:Cannon Rd,East Hartford,United States

Ravens @_@

2012-01-15T20:23:00.000-08:00

Ravens Won today meaning they're going to play Patriots next sunday! i can't wait! what's more exciting about it? I'm a patriot fan and he's a die hard ravens fan. Whoever wins I'll still be happy but it's gonna be an exciting game for me and boyfriend oh I know how he hates losing! hahaha... I had a great weekend off with him. We played MW3 together, watch movies, spent quality time together that's all i need <3 I bought my pink controller and i can't wait to get it in the mail this coming week.

We've been planning a great vacation getaway this coming april but don't know where yet.! thinking bout bahamas! yey! but he needs to get a passport! hmmp. anyway i want to see the beach, a warm one since i didn't really get to go to the beach when i went home...

I'm also starting the process of petitioning my mom so she could come here... i hope it's not that expensive... >.< anyway i can't wait to bring her here...

what else? hmmmm great weekend, back to work tom! then off on tuesday :) till then... babush!

P.S watched Vampire Diaries and Pretty little liars. can't wait for the next episode!

Patriots baby!

2012-01-14T23:08:00.001-08:00

My team won today! Hell yeah! Hahah i only watch playoffs and superbowl so yeah im pretty happy! I hope they go in for
superbowl...

Anyway had a good day off slept long then went to j&gs for eric's birthday then went to kuya mike's to watch football after that back to the house made a drink for both of us and bonding moment playing mw3..

1 more night then back to work, can't wait for my weekend vaca with my bheb on the 27th, quality time together!! Wohooo hope that we'll have fun.

Anyway need go to bed baltimore plays tom and that's my bheb's team so need to see it coz if they win they play patriots which means we have to go against each other!!

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Friday the 13th

2012-01-13T20:13:00.001-08:00

Woah this day is interesting @_@ everybody's being more careful for me it's just another day :)Weekend off!!! Hell yeah can't wait to watch the patriots game tom! Im kinda upset that i missed 2 nights not blogging! Grrrrr but it was worth it coz i spent my day with my bheb grocery shopping watching movies and of course playing MW3 lol like we played today and it was fun! We had burger king for dinner since i don't have energy to cook or prepare something to eat! Right now just lying here in bed blogging watching him play boxing :) oh i love days off like this <3

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I don't have to fake a smile

2012-01-10T19:55:00.001-08:00

At work, some days are stressful, busy, toxic or exhausting well most jobs are, you're going crazy trying to finish and catch up with all the things u need to do, assessments, meds and interventions to complications during dialysis tx, sometimes there's too much going and u forget to smile or pay attention to ur patients. Then, out of the blue, a patient will say something really nice and u know it's from their heart and everything goes away, all the stress just disappears right there. You think you the one making them better but actually my patients taught me to become a better person, they taught me to become more patient, and more understanding, they challenge me to widen my knowledge when they ask me questions. well i have my days that i get irritated and some patients that just get into my nerves, But to have more good people to take care of? I think its all worth it. I don't have to fake a smile. The hugs, the smile and thank you's are enough to keep me going for another day.- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Pink controller

2012-01-09T19:14:00.001-08:00

Ahhhh so hard to find it unless i order it online but im freakin impatient i want it now, if i order it online it would take 3 days or more. Anyway i moved on for now, ill get it next week for now i got myself a gaming chair for a very good deal, i was able to redeem myrewards so i had almost 40$ off... Then gemoy got us zumba belts for the wii..

Then we played mw3 for a little bit and i think im getting better hahaI miss my bheb i cant wait for his day off!!

Btw! I got a boo boo stab myself deep with a 10cc syringe thank God its not contaminated or from a patient coz thats a really big trouble.

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My menudo

2012-01-08T20:40:00.001-08:00

Cooked dinner today after sleeping my whole day off! Grrrrr

I was gonna play and have fun on my off but i slept it off like i always do! Hmp anyway maybe tom ill find some time anyway i did laundry today so my day is still productive! - Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

MW3

2012-01-07T20:58:00.001-08:00

Not a long blog today! Lol practicing MW3 wohoooo, i got my PS3 friday! boyfriend got it for me for pahabol xmas gift! hahahaha im spoiled @_@ with MW3 game too, he didn't find the pink controller i like maybe next week ill get it for myself! lol anyway, this is the longest i played this game and let me tell u i suck! I think counter strike is easier, im having trouble with the maps since im new im not too familiar with the maps, so i end up staying in one spot so i can kill somebody or die gazillion times trying to be familiar of the map by roaming around and staying alive as long as i could, but i had fun tho.

Anyway i had a great day at work even if it was kinda crazy bec we had a call out and i had to be the tech for the day thank God we were able to finish early and it was a smooth turnover so everything was perfect. :) oh well thats pretty much it for today...Tom im off meaning more modern warfare and maybe mario bro! Weeeee :)- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Nursing school

2012-01-06T20:54:00.001-08:00

Sometimes i still can't believe I'm already a nurse, after all the things I've been through, and here i am getting paid in doing what i love to do...Years gone by so quick if i can only replay moments back when i was still in college, living dAy by day. my only worries are if I am going to pass the long quiz that our terror professor will give us, 100 pages of lectures overnight together with other subjects that you also have to worry about.Wondering who will be your next clinical instructor, hoping she/he is cool enough not to give too many drug studies and hopefully divide the group in larger number for case studies even if you know no matter how many is in the group it's the most grade conscious who's gonna do all the work while you email her/him all the junk info you found in google about the case study. And of course the hospital duty, the excitement when you know you're next rotation will be in a special area like delivery and operating room, the only places you can wear you super white scrub suits and ofcourse don't forget to buy slippers! Or if ur parents are rich maybe some pair of crocs, or bootleg crocs that you can get at the flea market.I think what differs us from around the world is the experience we get from nursing school back home, we get to act like we are full pledge nurses. favorite part? Delivery room! that feeling you get when you get to be a part of a baby's life, your the first ever person to hold this angel even before the mother can get to hold him/her. The process of giving birth that took a whole long semester to be explained will only happen for 30mins even less without labor process ofcourse. Next fave? Emergency! Oh i love the rush feeling and all that. Expect the unexpected! I tell people stories of things i was able to do back in nursing school, deliveries, circumcisions, stitches, assist surgeries, faint 10x inside the OR, be 2 steps away from a live human brain and many many more stuffs and i look back on the things i missed to do because for me it wasn't interesting enough back and i wish i took the initiative to always observe and always persist to learn maybe i have more stories to share today. How bout you? How was your nursing school? Was it more fun?-Don’t ever regret anything, because at one point it was exactly what you wanted.

Charge nurse

2012-01-05T20:22:00.001-08:00

I was the charge nurse earlier and i didn't even had any idea lol it was a great day tho busy but not that toxic.

I cooked adobo and cleaned the house when i got home, tom 13hrs again then saturday too.. Wow what a busy week, can't wait to have a day off and play mario ahaha!

Oh well im getting sleepy n tired now maybe tom a longer blog :)

Snack before bed ;)

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2days before

2012-01-04T20:07:00.001-08:00

Blog i made 2 days before going home :)

Ive waited soooo long for this day to actuAlly come! 2more days and ill be home with my family and friends. 1,216 days to be exact., that's how many days ive been away from home. I wish i can tell the whole world right now and post this blog on my wall but i can't,! I have to surprise my mom :) i just have to! I can't wait to see the reaction on her face how surprise she will be... Oh my! I know 3weeks will really pass by quick but for sure ill have a blast.. I will surely miss my bheb :( this is the longest that we will not see each other and it's breaking my heart but i have to this once and for all, to be able to spend quality time with family and friends...I will be the happiest girl in the world once the plane lands in my home land! I would be sooooo hyper that my ears are always red. Lol i just can't wait to see everybody :) Not easy planning all this. Especially i only had limited help since only few people know that im goin home. It sucks but oh well!Anyway going to bed now 2 more work days then ill be HOME. <3

-Don’t ever regret anything, because at one point it was exactly what you wanted.

Planning, Planner!

2012-01-03T20:55:00.000-08:00

Today was a crazy day at work! morning rush plus a lot going on in my pod, worked til 6 30pm. I'm beat! but it's okay I'm off tom which is great! I went to B&N earlier to my dismay the planner that i bought a week ago went on sale!!!! that sucks right? now i grabbed more planners that I'm not even going to use but I'll probably give it away to special people..! People that will actually use them.

I love planners, it helped me a lot last year with my bills, schedules and stuffs. I have an app on my phone as well as my ipad but it's still different when you can actually right on it. It made my 2011 a little bit more organized. :)

Hell yeah I'm off tomorrow!!!!!!!!!! ciao! im getting really tired sitting here beside my laptop for the past 5 hours. such a loser @_@ lol

Day 1 & 2

2012-01-02T20:24:00.000-08:00

awww! I made a blog yesterday! for whatever reason it didn't got posted on my blog! that was a real bummer! anyway! i had a great new year's eve even if somebody almost ruined it by trying to take my guests away lol. first time that we celebrated new year in our place. Get together with all close friends plus our cousin from NH drove here with her whole family to celebrate New Year with us. We had foods and alcohol, drinking games and beer pong!

My cousin stayed over for the night, oh my little jaxon was the star of the day and night such a cute bubbly boy!

Sooo cute! :)

Ate deanna helped me with the cooking she made some deviled eggs and meat balls, I made pasta, fruit cake, spanish rice, shrimp, buttered corn.

We all had fun and got drunk @_@ my bheb was so drunk that he fell on the floor didn't even remembered it happening he was a total mess.. lol

Ate tata and her whole family spent the night here and they left around 3 pm the next day chit chat galore! we miss her and we can't get enough of jaxon! hahah everybody fell in love with him! the other 2 boys are well behaved so there's no problem with them just hanging out in gemoy's room while the adults are in the living room getting drunk!

DAY 2

gemoy bough wii today! hahaha and i bought my pink controller :) and Just Dance 3 game lol we actually had fun earlier trying it out! i recorded a dance video while trying it for the first time. i think we did okay hahaha but we had a great time and wheeeww it's tiring! it's like attending a zumba class lol

I played mario and finished world 1 but oh my i had a hard time using the controller but i got used to it by the 3rd stage. Oh how i miss playing this game. It brought back those memories of my younger years hahah. How fun playing mario in my first console the FAMILY COMPUTER lol

anyway new year, new books! i have to finish this book that i bought recently, can't keep buying books without reading it right?

Interesting Isn't it?

This is just one chapter of the book.

NEW YEAR, MORE BLOGGING. 364 Days :) since i missed the first day lol we'll see :p

Merry christmas!

2011-12-25T20:36:00.001-08:00

Yey! I think this is the most expensive christmas ever! Lol but i got everybody what they wanted so im pretty happy bout that and i also got what i wanted :) i got a bose speaker coz i left mine back home so bf bought me another one, a smaller one actually and much more portable, i was contemplating if ill get the ps3 instead but i got a sign that i should get the bose first, its the last box they have so i was like, u know what ill get the ps3 next time :) all in all it's a good day everybody had fun. Got kuya mike the biggest patron ever!

Then we went to ate beng's party too! I saw my kuya rodney and pretty bella oh my she's sooo big now!!!

We also played drinking games at kuya mike, the what the f*ck game it was fun until everybody's starting to get real tipsy from all the shots!

Then we went home and opened our gifts,

-

We got ate mhel the keurig coffee maker, lol she was soo excited to use it.

Then i also got bheb some tints for his car, :)

Anyway i had a great christmas and hopefully new year will bring
More fun and more blessings!!

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Vlog!

2011-12-23T17:58:00.001-08:00

YouTube Video

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The 23rd

2011-12-23T16:59:00.001-08:00

Yey one more tulog christmas eve na! I wish im home right now but oh well.! I miss everyone :(

Here at thr living room right now just got done wrapping gifts!

Look at the mess i made!

Anyway i visited my old job today it was nice seeing people i used to work with before. Then i went to the mall to do more shopping @_@ woah it was crazy! Too many people there everybody is rushing for the big day buying gifts and grocery shopping for food.

All in all i had a great day off, tom should be fun when i get out of work shower then straight to my cousin's house for fooooddd!
Nom nom nom.

-

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First year dialysis nurse

2011-12-21T21:22:00.001-08:00

Yey it's been a year already? I feel like i just started! I had a great year. I feel so blessed to actually have this job that i love and always looking forward to see my patients and co workers. What can i say? Everything's going good and i plan to keep it this way.. More and more years to come.. Hope to learn more each day. Next month il be going to tennessee for preceptor training @_@ im nervous and excited at the same time but i hope it's fun more responsibilities for me.

Today i brought my aunt's car to get a remote car starter installed so its easier for her during this winter season. Thats gemoy and I xmas gift to her since she already have so much stuffs!

On the other note i cooked one of my favorite food, bistek tagalog <3 been eating out for the past weeks i think it's time to stop being lazy and do some cooking :)

Well that 's my day today a day off well spent!

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Christmas tree <3

2011-12-20T20:36:00.001-08:00

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Shopping and Christmas party

2011-12-18T20:46:00.001-08:00

Oh my started the day shopping for christmas gifts! Too many people no parking available n its freezing outside but i was able to shop enough need to go back wednesday to complete our list!

On the other note, We had our christmas party yesterday with my co workers n of course its sooo fun!! We all had a great time. Russian food and lots of booze!!

Then afterwards me n jose went to chelsea's house to play beer pong and take note i beat jose's ass which is a great achievement for me lol! I had a great time !

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Starting to shop for xmas

2011-12-15T21:54:00.001-08:00

So we have christmas party for co workers this coming saturday and its gonna be fun! We have exchange gift portion which is worth 20 bucks. Oh my! I started buying some stuffs for the house like candles and some lotions, hand soap @ bath and body works. I have this weekend to continue my last minute shopping hopefully i'll finish' this weekend is going to be hectic! @_@
This is what im planning to wear but maybe ill settle for another dress!

New stiletto!

Need to be in bed sooooon! I got home early today but my body just feel soooo tired that i fell asleep at the couch! I took like a almost 2 hrs nap so its not bad.. Went to the mall, had a quick free time for myself and tom back to work! Last day thank God

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Yehey!

2011-12-13T20:24:00.001-08:00

Got an award today.. For doing a great job i guess? Wow few more days ill be one year as a dialysis nurse and im happy! I love my job and people that i worked with, i love the patients my schedule my boss.. Everything is perfect! And this? Wow i was surprised when she handed this to me earlier.

-Thank you Lord for everything :)

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14 episodes

2011-12-12T01:08:00.001-08:00

I finished 14 episodes of one tree hill today. im such a loser! Stayed home watch and Just ate all day.. Its relaxing tho.. Oh well.. I need to go to bed really soon! Its 4am and im still wide awake. Don't wanna be in bed whole day tom.

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Moe's, my work day etc.

2011-12-09T19:36:00.001-08:00

Nyaha! Too late my plate was empty already when i took the pic! Oh well food is good in this place it's like mexican version of subway... Food is fresh ;) my bheb and i had dinner since we never really get to eat out recently coz we're trying to save money and im basically broke! Thanks to my soooo expensive car starter @_@ but i love it, i love how my car is soo warm and comfortable especially during morning time when im leaving for work!

I had a short day at work! 8hrs and it was good too not too stressed out which scares me for tom @_@ lol it gets so stressful in some pods oh well last day so it should be quiet *wishing*

Reminded me of the other day when i was on the same pod, my whole morning was quiet and calm then in the afternoon one patient crashed with bp of 69/50 unresponsive opened the saline bag gave around 300 still no response i was just shaking all over then i can hear secretions in her throat so scared she will aspirate i grabbed the suction by then patient became responsive after maybe 800cc of saline. Oh well what a day!

Anyway its a good day overall no complaints! And oh i just love being able to blog more often!! :)

Hahah bheb sleeping already! Knocked out <3
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Just memories

2011-12-09T19:24:00.001-08:00

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Goodluck going to bed

2011-12-07T20:19:00.001-08:00

Arggggh still wide awake, i made a video earlier and its actually pretty cool :)

Compilation of video clips and pics from the whole 3 weeks i was there.

Anyway today i just stayed home, starting to watch one tree hill again since im done watching all the new series that i have been really addicted to, and also i bought an inspirational book called chicken soup for the nurse soul. I read the first 3 stories and it was nice, now im just lying in bed trying to fall asleep as quickly as i can since i have work tom! I need to be sleeping by now but here i am blogging! I actually like that i can blog from my phone it's much more easier!

Anyway hitting the sack got to have a lot of energy for tom :)

-There's my bheb playing his xbox

Nytie nyt!

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So awake

2011-12-05T22:29:00.001-08:00

It's 1:20 am and im still up 😱 did laundry, ironed my uniforms, vacuum the house, still have so much energy! Well i slept for 13 hours earlier that's why. Aggrrr i ruined my sleeping pattern again, ive been watching walking dead and im on the 2nd season :) so addicted but im more addicted to vampire diaries i can't wait for the next episode that will be aired on the 5th of january! Im way too excited.

Anyway i forgot to mention last sunday we had an event at work for our patients it was really fun! A little jazz concert performed by group that consist of kids and they are very tAlented, we had some food served for everybody and it was a success!

On the other note, Yesterday ate gemma went back to arizona :( don't know when she'll visit us again...

Anyway i think im starting to get sleepy,, back to work tom then wednesday off isn't that great ?! Lovin life.

Goodnight yall 😘-

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Thai food

2011-12-03T11:41:00.001-08:00

So the other night we tried to go have some thai food, a co worker told me that food there is really good so i was so eager to try... I hade chicken mango. Their appetizers were good i like the chicken stewers ( satay ) i think thats what they called it, then the chicken dumplings.

My bheb had beef with broccoli. And for dessert we had fried banana with ice cream.

Honestly i didn't like the chicken mango, fruit and meat doesn't taste good together, it just taste weird and nasty for me but i ate all the mango slices even if it was warm. I will never order anything like that anymore lol! But we were supposed to have some margaritas afterward but i was just too tired @_@ too bad.. Anyway fun night for me..

Till next time :)

Car starter!

2011-11-30T19:29:00.001-08:00

Yey had my car remote starter!!! Next week ill have some tints on my car :) ella will be lookin fabulous!

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My day today

2011-11-27T19:58:00.001-08:00

To start off my day we went to friendlys for breakfast and i couldn't believe i finished all this food waaaaa.. It was sooo good :)

For lunch my aunt grilled some steaks and sausage its her bday today but we already celebrated her birthday last night, we threw a surprise party for her and we didn't failed bec she was surprised and she had a lot of fun last night.

Open bar! Look at all the glass in front of her, all empty!

Ate ta surprised my aunt too she lives in new hampshire and visited for the party. everybody was lookin good with their dress and tux. I just wished jose was there too but he got to go to work last night!

Happy birthday auntie! Lol

Anyway rwally getting tired now ttyl :) love love! <3

Breakingdawn

2011-11-25T20:26:00.001-08:00

Watched twilight breaking dawn part 1 with gemoy,, movie was soo good except bella was ugly the whole movie except for the last part when she evolved to a vampire! Lol anyway overall it was worth it, a good movie indeed! Cant wait for the part 2!!!

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Phone pics :)

2011-11-24T11:34:00.001-08:00

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Gemoy's new car!

2011-11-24T11:27:00.001-08:00

Biyay finally bought her first new car! 2012 mazda 3 brand new! :)

Now my ella's twin,
shadow :)

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Thanksgiving!

2011-11-24T11:24:00.001-08:00

Headin to bheb grandma's house! Brunch! Lol woke up this morning going crazy about vampire diaries! Im almost at the end of the season and it sucks coz i really like the show and i enjoy watching it.

Anywy here right now celebrating thanksgiving! First time that i don't have to work. Then might experience black friday tonight ;) ohhh life is good! I have a lot of things to thank for i feel so blessed, i have people that i love around me and also cares for me thats all i need!

I just recently went for vacation back home and ill tell u more about it next time ;)

For now im trying to make myself busy by blogging till we go to kuya mike's house for another set of meal! Weeee so full -

Oh my! Up so early!

2011-11-15T01:03:00.001-08:00

First day back to work! Hmmmm i really miss it but still vacation hungover! Lol i miss my patients tho! Cant wait to see them. Anyway, loving my sched coz im gonna be off again tom. Lol

On the other note, i stumbled upon this book inside the grocery store and it's kinda interesting.

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Morning!

2011-11-14T09:14:00.001-08:00

Coffee from starbucks this morning... Can't sleep and need to stay up for the day @_@ i miss starbucks here :) taste better.

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Me and love

2011-11-11T09:09:00.001-08:00

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Location:Ash St,East Hartford,United States

iPhone 4s

2011-10-14T19:00:00.001-07:00

I can't believe I fell in line for a phone this morning. I got the iPhone 4 2 weeks ago thinking the next one won't come out anytime soon. Oh well got at the mall @ 6 15 am and there's no people in line outside so we decided to grab some coffee first then head back, good thing we were able to be there first, I'm a gadget freak but it never crossed my mind to actually camp out or wait hours outside a store. It was a crazy experience. People were civilized so it was ok. I got the phone that I wanted and we got home around 8 30sh.

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Shopping!

2011-10-09T19:12:00.001-07:00

Today we went shopping :) i went to get a new purse, i bigger one so i can fit all my stuffa like camera, flip, make up stuffs and whatever accesories and gadgets! I cant find anything bigger but this will work. There's a lot of sale and people too! Gosh never seen coach so packed like that in a long time! Then we went to hollister but unfortunately there isn't much to see in there since we got there late. It was a really nice day too...

Then we decided to experiment on restaurants around town and i got really disappointed with this japanese restaurant that we saw. +a for presentation but , chicken so oily and theres no taste even the sauce didn't make any justice. Disappointing indeed but whatever.

Six flags then Casino night

2011-09-14T15:28:00.001-07:00

Me and my bheb went to six flags yesterday after i got out of work, i went for 4 hours shift and then head home to have some fun! And yes we had a really great time with roller coaster rides! Six flags was packed! Left us with no

choice but to purchase a flash pass! Totally worth it! I just remembered how fn rollercoasters are! On our 2nd try to go for bizarro they were having some technical issues that made us backed out lol pretty scary huh!.? Fright fest time and a lot of employees dressed up like zombies and some other crazy costumes Lol

Then at night time we decided to hit the casino, i dnt really gamble but whatever... We had fun and i won! 80$ after that i stopped lol pretty fun tho... Me and my bheb had a blast! It was a perfect day :)

Box!

2011-09-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

finally done packing one box to send home, 2 more to go! :)
slept for 14 hrs today and now i cant sleep and im working 12 hrs shift! anyway trying to save that money! went to have breakfast at olive garden and im really not feeling it. no appetite for the past few weeks and that's not good!

working on a labor day! nice. i cant wait for october to come @_@

Hurricane irene!

2011-09-01T19:57:00.000-07:00

Woah, late reaction, oh well still dnt have time to blog, always my excuse! We didn't have power for almost 2days! And it was bad, what made it worse is our stove is electric and we cant even boil water or heat food! It was just crazy... For 3 years this is the first time i experienced a black out and it's not fun at all!

Still thankful tho that it's only power that we lost unlike other people who lost their home due to the flood...

We went to the gym to shower at my aunt's to charge all our gadgets, it's crazy how all stores ran out of batteries and flashlights,! Panic buying! Not even ice were available so we cud put it in a freezer and throw some of our meat in the fridge! Oh well next time ill be prepared! I hope theres no next time anymore because it's so freakin boring nothing to do. Not even mc donald's and dunkin donuts down the road from us is open the next day after the hurricane. Gas stations were close too it's ridiculous!!!

Getting closer

2011-08-14T20:57:00.000-07:00

Sooo excited! I wish it's october already... Hmmmm been working everyday as usual and im freakin gaining weight too much eating! Can't believe i reached 120lbs lol... Ill get a gym memebership this week that way i could lose all this fast food fats lol!

I miss homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee,! I cant wait to go home and relax :( whennnn?.. How i wish! Anyway will be updating soon i promise,!

August already?

2011-08-02T19:13:00.000-07:00

Oh my how are you my dear blog.? Ive been very busy working lately as usual.. Time flies by!

Anyway a lot happened last july, bheb got into an accident and his car was wrecked. Good thing nothing serious happened to him but a sore back. I was so worried @_@ anyway he's fine now and everything's going back to normal.. I really wish i could blog more often but just so busy at work and when i get home there's no enough time to blog.

Went to a spa for a facial since im breaking out badly but it didn't really helped me, the massage felt really good tho! :)

October come sooner! Soooooo excited <3

My july!

2011-07-27T19:48:00.000-07:00

Oh my july is almost done! Summer don't end yet! Been working the whole month and maybe till august and september! But oh well i have to make the most out of it right?im not going to lie it's really tiring but i have to suck it up.. Have big plans this fall and nothings going to stop me! Lol

I got lucky today! To my stupidity i left my wallet on top of my trunk after putting gas in my car, drove couple of miles until i realized where it was and thank God it was still there!!! Almost lost the money for rent! Thank you lord!

Anyway so far so good, its actually nice that im working everyday because it's stopping me to go out and go shopping... The bad side is im sooooo tired when i get home and i don't wanna do anything anymore but to sit or take a nap... Anyway... Ill just keep u posted been busy lately and i didnt have any time to update my blog as often i want to...

Oh my pagod :(

2011-07-11T20:48:00.000-07:00

Sssooo tired earlier oh my! Maybe bec of lack of sleep the other night, as soon as i got home i just passed out without eating anything... Woke up 2 hrs later n i felt energized...

Now my problem is i cant go back to bed lol!!! Anyway i had a good day today.. Hopefully tomorrow's better.. Missing my boyfie :) it's going to b a very long month for us hoping we get through this..

On the other note, summer is going by too quick.. Not good!, @_@ anyway headin to bed have the rest of the week for me to look forward to... Gdnyt blog!,

Inlove with ipad 2

2011-07-10T15:29:00.000-07:00

Finally got my ipad yesterday wasn't expecting it at all i thought it's gonna take 3 weeks but only took 5 days! Lol oh well i think im going to be able to blog more often than ever! Hopefully!!!

This past months have been crazy and lots of things happen but unfortunately i can't put all the details! Went back to jersey last month of june,
And we had sooooo much fun! We went to the beach, visited kyle's place and also went clubbing at karma VIP status! Awesome isn't it.? Was sooo expensive tho after that weekend i didn't even want to check my bank account! Lol

Anyway hopefull ill updating my blog more as much as possible everyday :) lol

My day today :)

2011-04-26T16:53:00.000-07:00

Oh how i miss blogging... Ive been pushing myself to update my blog but im so into my fb nowadays and it's just making me lazy to blog about my daily life.

Today i worked overtime for 4 hrs. Supposedly my dayoff but couple of hours will be fine, drove around with my cousin and picked up ate analyn at their house.. We decided to go shopping, my bankcard probably hates me now for all the swiping i did earlier.. Hmmmmp! Anyway we had fun. Tried something new for lunch, so we pick a place that sounded soo good at my yelp app... Oh my horrible food! Ill update this blog for pictures...for now im going to bed.. Ill update it with pictures sometime this week... :)

road trip :)

2011-03-29T00:31:00.000-07:00

yey i have something to blog! OUR ROAD TRIP. we've been planning for a trip for a long time now and finally it happened! it was a short one but at least we had a chance to do it! we went to NY to see MOMA (museum of modern art) it was so nice in there and there's a lot of people so be sure to go there early! and if you can buy tickets online pelase do so, it will save you time and skips the super long line! Ticket price was $20. Took lots of pics and here are some of my faves:

after NY, we dropped by at Newark NJ to go to the filipino store and oh my i got really excited! hahaha seeing a lot of filipinos and all filipino snacks and food! i was gonna get my red ribbon mango cake but it's going to go bad because i have no choice but to put it inside the trunk or carry it on my lap... oh well next time :)

then we went to atlantic city, NJ :) it's like mini vegas oh my! the view at night? awesome! clubs and bars too! so many people @_@ drinks are expensive, so prepare your wallets and cards :) I almost forgot my ID! good thing bf asked me if i have my ID and i realized i left it. hmmmp so we had to ask the driver to go back. we rented a cab that way we don't have to worry about who's the designated driver. and oh my there's so many NO U TURNS road. they have designated roads for you to make U turns and that really sucks because it makes the trip longer. We got wasted and we had fun!

The next morning after 20 mins on the road headin to seaside heights i realized my wallet was not in my purse i panicked got so pissed and i was sooooo mad because now we have to drive back and it took another hour just to get back to the hotel then back to the highway and it was my fault for not checking again if i have all my stuff. I am so pissed that i have a really bad memory @_@ ahhhrrrg! anyway even after that we managed to arrived safely at the famous JERSEY SHORE lol. seaside park to be exact. we were trying to find the jersey shore house but we just cant find it plus the weather is not really cooperating, it was sunny but so damn cold! we played arcade games and it was really fun! plus i won a DOMOKUN doll the big one so I'm really happy :)

all in all it was a fun ride, a little drama and some interruptions but for me it was nice to do that at least once in a while.

work. life. updates

2011-03-08T17:39:00.000-08:00

hi blog! :) sorrrrrrrryyy it's been a while! I know i promised this year will be better but I've been missing day @_@ i don't even know where to start to update you...

been very busy laely or if not just tired and not in the mood. Sometimes I'm just so stressed out and drained when I get home from work. It's not that I don't like my job, i super love it but there's so much responsibilities and it's just crazy @_@. i miss my old folks at the nursing home now that I'm working @ the dialysis center i have less time to work there.

Everyday you get to prolong a life. People with no kidneys functioning or at least minimal. Few young ones and it scares me to death. Most of them are real nice... :) Did i mention crying at work? yeah. I know I'm a cry baby.

Was all stressed out and overwhelmed that i just burst into tears. It's not because i got frustrated and wanted to quit but I was just stressed out that I can't do enough for everybody at that minute. i had 3 patients agitated and asking me where are they going to sit down (just got back from class don't know seating arrangement + there's still patients on their chairs getting dialyzed), 3 machines beeping all at the same time and one patient yelling at me because she wants her needle out, Ora mismo!

5 minutes later... patient said to me: "everything's gonna be alright, you'll see. Events like this makes you stronger.." and then here i Go again tears just rushed down my face. I was wearing a facemask and all covered with tears lol. I'm such a cry baby. But you know what? that day truly made me stronger, i get stressed out during turnovers but not to the point that i would break down.

anyway. blog is getting longer! updates updates!

since my fb is more updated I'll just post the pics of different happenings!

VALENTINES!

Feb. 09 ate deans BDAY!

Mall date with love :)

Freestyle Extravaganza

yey slot machines!

my new tat :) finished!

ellie :)

hey there blog!

2011-02-07T19:20:00.000-08:00

How are you? just wondering what you've been up to lol! i was meaning to update you but got really caught up in our prep class and nurse class @ my job plus the very bad weather! grrrrr...

btw I got my very first car last monday and i was very very happy :)

Hahaha need to work harder i guess <3 Anyway, She's worth it.

Today i had a reaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllyyyy LONGGGGG day at work on my part time job.... I was assigned to a very complicated floor at least for a newbie like me... I don't know why accepted it but oh boy I got really frustrated and so stressed out to the point I almost quit and just walk out...

but I made it through the day and hopefully nothing went wrong. I love this residents but some of them are really needy sometimes and I wish I have all the time in the world for them but i don't... I am limited to an 8 hour shift and usually stay for another hour just to chart and do paperworks.

I think I got spoiled on my other job that I can't handle the stress in the Nursing home anymore lol. but oh well need to make the money ayt?

the downside, my vacation back home is a little blurry now with all this expenses :( but i really wish this year I could make it <3

Day 1 of CLass

2011-01-24T20:03:00.000-08:00

first day of my class earlier for my prep class for Dialysis and as usual I never learn my lesson and I was 30 mins late because for some reason my gps on my phone is messed up and keeps on bringing me at the wrong location (Hospital nearby), I got very impatient and told my bf to just drop me off there and I'll find my way inside the building and just ask question so I did and for some reason I don't know why I didn't call my preceptor the first time we got lost lol then I finally called and gave me the number of Davita where the class is. So i called and they told me that it's not inside a hospital but rather a couple of blocks away. There's no way I would walk from where I was to towards the facility with a 0 degree weather. Good thing bf wasn't that far yet and was able to still drive me there. (At this point i was hysterically crying because I'm already late in the first day of class).

Anyway, the instructor and the whole class was really nice and good thing I didn't miss any of the discussion because they were just introducing there self to each other.

I've learn a lot on our first day, I wish we have this much longer than a week. It's actually fun!

Anyway I got my dress for the wedding of cha and chris this coming saturday! I loved the first dress I picked and I can't stop thinking about it but the color is a little lighter than the actual color so I went for my 2nd choice and it's nice and simple yet elegant looking well at least that's how I see it. I'm actually really excited It's been a long time since I was a bridesmaid in a wedding.

anyway another day in class tomorrow hopefully it doesn't snow so bad @_@

Sunday!

2011-01-23T20:53:00.000-08:00

omg! I am so drained right now... So close to falling asleep but I have to fight it coz I need to update my blog. lol Been busy lately... my last post was a little sad PMS or something but I was really upset and down... But oh well better days now... working and I have a class tom! I'm super excited! It's part of my training and I can't wait to be back on a classroom setting... feeling like a college student again!

I woke up so early this morning and didn't take a nap so I'm pretty much drained right now. I went to the store earlier to buy a plunger coz i think the tub is clogged but guess what?! I ended up grabbing stuffs for the house.. ahhhh I'll never learn, 'Crazy!

Anyway we had fun this weeked hangin out with Jose's friends... Went to margaritas and spent time there then went to Josh house to play some pong.

Anyway blog I'll update you again tomorrow of some details over the week that I forgot to mention here!

babush!

Inside my head

2011-01-13T19:57:00.000-08:00

Today was a really bad day, depressing. I never felt so alone. I just want to scream and hit or break something. Maybe it would help.

It's so hard to balance everything in life. Whatever your priorities are, sometimes you get to a point where you focus too much on one thing and loses balance on the others. That's what exactly is happening to me right now.

Career, Work, Family, Love and God. I know God should be the center of everything but I am not a saint sometimes I fail. I try but I know it's not even enough.

FAMILY? oh yeah I support them financially, we have conversations through YM but talk? hmmm I think that's what I am a financial supporter. Don't get me wrong. I love my family i think that's the main reason I'm still here. Actually the only reason I am here. I was contended back home but communication is a big problem. If you have sister/Aunt/dad/mom/brother or whoever supports you from US try to appreciate them as much as you could. I honestly avoid calls sometimes. its not that I don't want to hear their voice. I would love to see them, hug them have a dinner with them like we used to. but who would love to call if what you will always hear is problems? we already have so much to worry here. I think a little good news is nice to hear.

Relationship Wise. I'm struggling. We're struggling. ALL relationships have ups and downs. I barely have time nor does he have time. I hate fights especially if it's not worth it. I think I graduated on that one long time ago. I'm already 23 i think I already graduated from lies, cheating, crushes or whatsoever. I am actually proud of how patient I am now. I'm slowly losing it but I'm holding on. I've been through different types of relationships and I learned a lot.

sabi nga "nya" buti pa siya pinagluluto mo, pinaglalaba, iniiyakan mo pa ni ako di ko naexperience yun sayo.."

I don't cry because he hurt my feelings, I cry coz I don't have somebody to run to like I had the old days. Back home HEARTBREAKS don't mean nothing. 1 case of red horse or 1 bottle of emperador with a bunch of friends pppsh overnight lang makakamove on ka na or kung hindi man edi next day uli.

I'm not saying he's a bad boyfriend I have my faults too but I'm soo hard to please. Well this part people would say, "work it out" it just means your relationship is getting stronger.

Career? that's the only good that's happening to me right now. I love my job. I love what I do and everyday I'm learning. Everyday I get to prolong somebody's life. I get to see the same people/patient therefore I get to bond with them and I think that's the best part of being a nurse. getting to know your patient being involved in their care the sad part about this job... it's either they get "well", worse, get a transplant or die.

I know tom will be a better day for me. It's just nice to have a blog an output of what's inside your head, how you feel at a certain moment and how you dealt with it.

Tomorrow I should be fine.

5th of January and I feel Old.

2011-01-05T19:43:00.000-08:00

ei ei ei... i almost broke my promise! i said I'll be blogging more often but it's already the 5th and I'm just starting with my blog. I'm so into tumblr nowadays I love editing pics, share quotes and all that stuff but the turnoff about it is i think most of the users were kids like 13-18 years of age. damn i feel old! lol

I'm not talented enough to draw or paint or sketch. I wish I can! i can't even draw a cat or a pig! lol so thanks to photoshop! lol I can at least express my artistic side even if it's not really artistic for my viewers haahha...

Oh well, UPDATES! hmm I love my new job... been there for almost 3 weeks and I'm really enjoyin it! I work as a dialysis RN and i can't complain about the amount of work compared to working in LTC (tons of med pass, treatments and minimal pt interaction) i feel less stress and I'm actually challenged to learn more and also have the opportunity to strengthen my assessment skills.

Lately I've been sleeping late (2am) and I totally messed up my sleeping pattern :( arggghh but tonight imma sleep like a baby and be in bed on time at least before midnight.

Oh well some of my old pics edited to suit tumblr lol.

my 2010!

2010-12-26T20:40:00.000-08:00

woah 2010 has been very good to me in terms achieving my goals :) I've been very very blessed and I couldn't ask for more... I have new sets of goals for this year and I'm really hoping I could achieve everything as well! 2009 was full of struggles and this year was a big relief! I mean really big RELIEF!

Sad part bout this year is I lost so many precious people... I know that they're in a better place now but I just wish they didn't had to go yet... I don't want to lose anybody anymore at least for the next 50 years? i mean when I'm dead or when I'm way too old to remember!

Oh well how wasa your christmas guys?

mine was ok, i mean I get to be with my boyfriend and cousins! plus my cousin that I haven't seen for almost ten years visited us! weeee that was real fun to catch up and all wish we had more time but they had to leave the next day... and also I got what i wanted for christmas :) I wish home wasn't too far :( I miss Christmas in the Philippines!

I want to Thank God for a very blessed year and for taking good care of my family and always watching over them... also for a very healthy year and a very good relationship with my boyfriend love him to death!

Till death do us part

2010-12-19T18:38:00.000-08:00

It was my 2nd day of duty, I was working in a long term care facility and have couple of patients assigned to me… as I was doing my med pass, i was looking for one of my patient and I couldn’t find her anywhere… so I asked the CNA where she is and they said prolly in her husband room. So this lady is about on her 70s and I look at my list of patients and looked for the same last name and went straight to that room and found her there with her husband. She’s ambulating via wheelchair as well as her husband. I gave both their meds and I saw how caring they are for each other.

Every time i have my duty I would see the lady always go to her husband’s room (she’s more healthier) until one day the administrator decided to put them in the same room. They become one of my favorites I just love seeing a love so true and lasting.

One time I was asking the wife if she wanted to eat in the dining area since she’s more stronger than the guy and can ambulate without issues through her wheelchair, right away she would turn to her husband and ask him “are you going too?” the husband answered he’ll just stay in his room since he’s a little tired. She faced towards me and said “oh I’m not going cause my husband’s don’t want to come, I’ll just stay here with him”

Every time the husband would cough she would look at him with a very worried face and come to him closer just to rub his back… Or sometimes when I’m getting their vital signs I would hear them talk to each other and joke around…

Love never really fades… it’s up to the couple how to work their relationship out through all those years… and also stick to their vows of marriage <3

“from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part”

hey I'm on tumblr :)

2010-11-14T19:34:00.000-08:00

prettyrosedale.tumblr.com

Moving Out. AGAIN :)

2010-08-29T17:20:00.000-07:00

This is going to be my fourth home! Soon to have a permanent address! (at least for another year ) lol
Been very busy for the past 2 weeks looking for an apartment/condo unit I didn't expect it to be hard but it was! Especially because of the time frame and also considering the budget but we still managed to find one that fits the budget and also in a good location near our jobs! It's a condo unit with two bedrooms. I'm really excited and scared at the same time. It's the first time I would be "living-in" with a boyfriend in the same house but at least my cousin would be there too so that would help relieve the pressure on the relationship.
I'm excited coz my cousin is coming back here! :) It's kinda selfish but I am really happy.

I'm freaking out about the cooking part! save me! I don't know how to cook besides breakfast :/ lol

Anyway this is going to test how responsible or irresponsible i can be...

It was fun looking for stuffs to buy for the house tho. If only I have the money! We found a lot of cheap furniture too!

Anyways until now I haven't packed my things yet because of work and hectic schedule! hopefully tom I could set some things up to be ready to carry out the house in to the car and finally by wednesday everything should be ready!

P.S thanks to kuya jay for helping me out :)

Eminem - Love The Way You Lie ft. Rihanna

2010-08-08T19:03:00.000-07:00

This is by far my most favorite song of Eminem.. I can feel all the emotions in the lyrics. I just don't like the first kissing scene on the video, hmmmm... Oh well. I waited weeks for the premier of the music video and finally it's out!

thoughts

2010-08-08T17:17:00.000-07:00

It seems my life stopped @ 20. it's like my whole world stopped and I live to work. Yeah welcome to adulthood right? maybe if Philippines isn't such a poor country or maybe if my family wasn't poor I'll be happy to stay there and I would never had to leave...

You know how hard it is to make friends here? You meet racist people, you meet people who only wants to hang out with the same color as them or same race, you meet those two faced people and you meet people who's only friends with you when you're at work or some sort. It's hard to make friends because you hardly have time to socialize coz you're all working.

In the philippines, anywhere you can make friends. We don't believe in the saying "That's too personal" we'll ask anything in this world without hesitations, we'll even ask how much you make in a month or any personal questions. Things like that we don't care. hahaha I think we are more laid back people and we love making friends, forming groups. In school or at work for sure you know everybody's cellphone number. It's easy to know people and easy to hangout. There's a lot of down side on this things but the point is life never gets boring and you'll never feel alone.

I miss those days when you wake up and you have 100+ good morning text messages. Or when it's a holiday or when there's something special going on. Back then, i cant live without a cellphone, here I can't live without internet! that's my only connection to my friends back home...

Here, you have to watch out for everything and be careful on what you can and can't say.

anyways, I just miss home... and i've been missing home for the longest time... I'm just lucky to have the boyfriend. He's one of the reason that I'm sill here and not feeling lonely... He keeps me happy :)

Overall life is still good... just missing my friends :/

I need to update

2010-08-03T16:17:00.000-07:00

been wanting to blog for a long time but way too busy to do so. Work, then applying for a Nursing job and a lot of stuffs going on.

Me and my love went to movies last 07-23-10 to watch "Inception" for our 11 month date, guess who we saw? his ex! hahaha for the first time. It was kinda awkward because i had no idea it was her until my bheb told me. oh well.

Then last saturday we went to the Carnival in New Hartland it was fun! it reminded me of the carnivals back home. Pretty much the same concept but honestly we have more fun stuffs on our carnivals back home than here... more food choices, more rides and it's open till daylight! hhahaha. We went to Debbie's house (jose's friend) I had fun and everybody was nice! i had few smirnoffs.. just wish I wasn't tired that night prolly we could have stayed longer but i worked 12 hours and my body is complaining already...

On the other hand, Ate analyn is in the Philippines right now with her hubby and I really miss her. Work is boring without her... :( i don't have anybody to share my lunch with or my cookies or tell stories to so the time would run faster. Oh well she'll be there for 2 more weeks...

Right now. I'm trying to find a Job that I have been wanting to have for a long time but this economy sucks way too much that it's soooo hard to find one especially on my case not having any experience! grrr...

I have to be patient again :) oh well i have sooo much more to say but I'm too tired to blog so prollyy tom :) I need to update my blog more often anyway...

Grey's anatomy is keeping me busy this past few weeks and I'm loving it!

P.S making my blogs and pictures on public mode for couple of weeks... multiply is getting dry... and it sucks!

I got you! :)

2010-07-13T19:47:00.000-07:00

ok! this blog has been on my draft for a long time and i figured I needed to give justice and make a little changes and finally post it!

I know it's a little late and prolly you guys are tired of me bragging about passing my NCLEX RN exam but let's face it's not a very easy experience and I waited long enough to achieve this and been dreaming of the moment when I can finally share my story, my struggles and finally the success I've been waiting for.

Some people won't have the guts to admit how many times they really took it, and I admire those people who don't care about what people would think about them or don't care if people will judge them.

Nclex is not easy. Nothing is easy. The first time I didn't make it I was depressed for months, I don't even want to see my books, i don't even want to talk about it. I got mad. I blamed everybody, I blamed myself for not doing my best for thinking I never failed anything why would i fail this one? and then it happened and I got devastated, i felt all the money I spent and worked hard for, all went straight to trash.

I was embarrassed. I felt down. I got paranoid. I felt maybe I'm stupid? or dumb. I felt all the negative emotions. Then months passed i realized, wait. I am not going to get old and die not having a license, I worked hard for 4 years and I'm not giving up on this one! lol.

If I survived Sir Corpus(prof in NCM 104) Maam Weandy, Sir Manio (Prof in Pharmacology), and all those major subjects not mentioned, I'll survive anything! lol

I went back to my books, saved money and searched for a good review that would help me.

KAPLAN- practice questions were good but lack of content in my opinion. When I attended the class they just read questions and explained how they got the answer but no formal Med Surg on actual class. (didn't go through all my online review so i don't know that part) lol

Books: Saunders Comprehensive review.- I love the CD! but I suck at reading books just few pages you'll see me starting to fall asleep! So what I did was I answer questions then if I have questions I go to the book.

Mosby's Pharmacology Memory Note Cards : the best Pharmacology book I have ever had! I'm a visual learner and this books contains drawings, colors, and some comic type stories that's fun and very helpful for me to remember side effects and indications! If you're a visual learner you have to have this!

RN notes clinical pocket guide: a very tiny book that you could bring anywhere if you need to scan or try to memorize labs or some simple procedures.

HURST REVIEW (ONLINE): I owe it to them Big time! they have sets of handouts which you can print per topic or if you want the whole book itself. I prefer printing it topic per topic. You know why? Coz when I print the whole thing and I see it it seems so much for me to study all those stuffs. I printed it topic per topic at the end I was amazed how much pages I read and finish without even realizing it.

Iphone/Pod application (saunders): it's everywhere with me. When I don't have nothing to do and don't have my books with me I answer questions!

Feuer and Kaplan Audio: I listen to them while at work (Saturdays). Thanks to my super duper nice Supervisor letting me review while working :) i listen to them OVER and OVER!

ALLNURSES.com a super helpful forum for people like me, I got so much info's from that site and answered questions!

So now, I need to wait for my endorsement to finally be over and get my license for Connecticut since I have NY license. Another waiting process but hey! I waited 2 years what's few more weeks?

All the missed parties, gimiks, and outings are worth it! finally I can do stuffs that I have been wanting to do for a long time but I don't have time! Photography, blogging, pictorials, videos.

Super thanks to everybody that lighted candles and prayed for this success. It's worth it.

Dear John

2010-06-14T14:34:00.000-07:00

so I've been wanting to watch Dear John for a long time and finally last night me and my cousin rented it. The first part of the story was so good and also the drama part about the dad it made me cry. I also love the location and stuff. Then the end part was not what I'm expecting at all! it's kinda shocking and disappointing. They could have made it better but overall it's not that bad... Good thing I didn't watch it at the theater coz I would've been really disappointed.

oh well, anyways life is good and everything's fine! praying praying praying!

Let's talk about LOVE.

2010-06-07T18:53:00.000-07:00

Some love are naturally perfect, Some you have to work hard to make it perfect...

I fell in love so many times before, sometimes with the same person over and over again...and from those I learned so many lessons, earned so many heartaches too.

Sometimes you ask life so many questions like why cupid is unfair? You fall in love with a person that doesn't love you back or you can't love somebody who love you enough.

Things happen like you love each other so much but you can't be together because there's a lot of people involved that might get hurt if you decide to be together or you fell in love with the same sex and things got so complicated (generally speaking).

Why can't it be just You love him, He loves you. That's it. No complications. No heartaches.

Well I think that's the main challenge of love. Overcome all trials... work hard to make it happen and make it go on and on.

How bout soul mates? yes. I do believe I have a soul mate. I did found him, I believed from the very first time in my life that it's really is true. You really have this person that comes in your life and everything seems to be perfect. Like you fall in love everyday you see him. You feel those butterflies in your stomach whenever you imagine him, his kiss, his touch, his voice. Then suddenly in the end, the devil makes you doubt it. makes you think if this is real? No. it's too perfect to be real. Then you get scared. You get weak and then temptation sinks in then you just realized you got sucked in and you ruined everything.

You try fixing it. But as the old saying says when you break the trust you can't have it back anymore the way it was like a crumpled paper. There's this thought that it's never perfect anymore and it's not gonna be perfect no matter what you do. You come to think he doesn't deserve you anymore.

That's when you realize you have to move on. You have to let it go. Even how much it will hurt you.

They say it takes a full year or more to move on. Why? because of all the holidays, the dates and all the celebration. I believe when love is great it never lose a place in your heart.

Me? I find somebody to help me move on. In a way your using that person but if he loves you, it's fair enough to give it a try and maybe he can heal your heart or I find somebody wanting to move on, so that we can move on together and make new memories together.

Some love are challenged by distance. Others by the past love of their loved ones trying to compete with the past. Whatever it is, always think that even a tiny bit reason to fight for it, DO it. Hold on as much as you can. Then when every single solution fails. You let go.

I'm a kind of person that's challenged with the past. That's my thing. I try to do everything and prove that I'm better, that I'm more worth pursuing and I'm lucky to be successful.

I learned a lot from the past long relationships and this relationship i have right now is worth fighting for. It has its ups and downs but everything work out in the end. He's amazing in so many ways and I never imagined he will turned out to be that guy I always wanted in my life. and I can say I'm finally letting go of all the past. They're just memories now. Lessons learned.

It's been almost a year now. Thank you Lord for giving me memorable relationships. I'm still working on my fairytale and my own happy ending.

9th Month <3

2010-05-23T15:21:00.000-07:00

Happy 9 months bheb.. yay! time really fly so quick...

supposed to go to ihop this morning for our monthsary breakfast since my bheb got work today but by the time we got there it was so packed and decided to go to friendlys instead, then onas we're on our way there, we passed by Cheesecake factory, and we we have been planning to go there for a long time so we got really excited and decided to have breakfast there.

the food and smoothies were so good! super love it! I got a tiramisu cheesecake and it was alright, i think it's better if i got the strawberry one but whatever everything was perfect!

Last night, we had the chance to chill with eric since he put up a bonfire on their backyard.. it was actually nice and very calming.. I wish we were able to do this back home (Philippines) but there's no space since houses are built so close to each other...

For the past few weeks, I've been wanting to go home so bad... like really bad I always cry at night... good thing bheb always try to comfort me and make me feel better, i don't know how I'm going to survive loneliness if I didn't met him at all..

He made my life here a little easier and always try to cheer me up when I'm really down.. I miss everybody.. like EVERYBODY and EVERYTHING.

I don't have any choice but to deal with the loneliness.. I can't wait for that day to come that I could finally see everybody, hug them tight, laugh with them, do silly stuffs, reminisce moments, chill, smoke, drink, play cards... I even miss riding a jeepney or tricycle...

Oh well another day. I survived! lol

Again, HAPPY 9th Monthsary bheb... I'm happy I made you fall in love with me. :-)

The Last letter

2010-05-16T22:36:00.000-07:00

I will get there...

2010-05-04T13:06:00.000-07:00

Work work work... no time to study as usual... what keeps me busy nowadays is my bheb, my books and some blogs that always read from other sites which really helps me a lot and motivates me but FACEBOOK always ruins everything for me... it is just way too addicting... lol

I was scheduled to work today for overtime but since they sent us home early yesterday and usually most of the time I can't afford to waste my effort and wake up early only to go to work for 4 hours... when I can rest instead and actually enough time to study and do some chores...

I'm actually Losing hope about my nursing thing... it seems like time goes by faster each day and I just get lazier and lazier... I need some strong motivation... I always think of some sort of things I like and I want to do after I finally get over this review and finally hold that License...

I know, God have plans for me or for everyone in the whole wide word... that's the only reason i could think about.. Im sooo close... I just have to double or even triple my efforts and prayers... I can't wait for that day that I could actually say I'm finally a registered nurse.

After those 4 long years you go to school and those mean teachers and overnight group study and group projects? Oh well... I know everything will turn out to be just fine... :-)

On the other note, I miss my HOME! i miss everybody so much... I just want to say sorry for those people who constantly leaving messages on my YM if wasn't able to reply.. I'm just way too busy at work and studying... e-mail you guys pretty soon...

Does facebook ruin relationships?

2010-04-19T14:35:00.000-07:00

yeah I got this as my status earlier... i had this conversation with my boyfriend and i really felt it bothered him so much when i was talking to my long lost friend back in elementary... My boyfriend was bothered because i was talking to a guy... and my bf is kinda the jealous type... and it was my fault because i didn't informed him about that conversation. It wasn't a big deal for me but i immediately think that what if he did the same thing and forgot to let me know? would i be upset? of course I will be!

So i tried to calm down and talk it out with him... tried to explain everything... I was a friendster fan way back HS and college... I'll never let a day pass without checking it just to see who viewed my profile and maybe who looked at my new uploaded pictures...

I never had a problem with my recent ex boyfriend about anything on friendster, not that I know of. Just because we are always together anyway... i guess i forgot about that and now still acting the way I was...

So me and my bf had a long talk about it and finally he understood my point of being far away from everybody and all my friends which i can only have conversations through facebook or chats...

Now I'm trying to put myself in his position and try to think before i do something because I don't really want to make him feel upset about anything and also i don't want to ruin what we already have just because of this small things thats bothering him.

I need to study anyway...

Long Week

2010-04-03T13:54:00.000-07:00

yay! Happy Easter! If I didn't have to work tom. I would probably attend the mass but unfortunately, I need to work.

Tomorrow should be my day off til wednesday but like i said 7 more days til my day off! woah... Plus, tomorrow should be busy and really exhausting but i'll manage to survive...

I miss my bheb! no cuddling for a couple of days til our day off plus he will be transferred to a different shift, meaning we have lesser time together... :-(

But we should be happy and thankful if he finally got hired... it's really hard to find a job nowadays and this is just a challenge to our relationship... oh well. I'm kinda sleepy now but here's a whole lot pages of book to read!

why do you blog?

2010-03-30T12:36:00.000-07:00

another day.. it's been a while since i last blogged.. i kinda missing
it so I'm writing one today..

i love to blog because its like giving me something to read in the future and make me remember what happened on these days of my life. It will also help me reflect if i had live a
good life or i had a lot to regret but either way I'm hoping it to be all good..

wishing that someday, like maybe few more years after, I'll be reading all this will
give a smile on my face rather than having all the regrets...

i love blogging i just dont have time to do it recently because of a lot of priorities that i need to be focused on.. blogging makes me a happy person too.. it makes me good at
telling stories and giving details on whats happening in my life.. it's more of a personal thing to read but I chose to make it public so maybe my readers could reflect on my experiences or relate to me in some way..
In my own personal view, it doesn't mean you have to make it private to be personal..

Blogging also helps me release stress and a big output of my ideas and whats
going on in my so called life.. but whatever ur reasons are for blogging either to make money or simply just make urself feel better by expressing urself. i personally think its very healthy on our emotional well being.. its like talking to somebody but you just want to feel that you've been heard by your friends or readers. i just love it! it sums up how i make decisions how i deal with circumstances and changes in my life and also makes a good source of evidence how my thinking matures overtime...

Happy 7th Month... <3

2010-03-22T18:01:00.000-07:00

yep. happy 7th month my Love... I had so much fun earlier at the gym... we planned going to the gym around 6:30 am but since he can't wake me up coz i was sleeping like a baby.. i got up on my own around 10 then we had a super delicious breakfast @ iHop.. pancakes, eggs and sausage...

After that we decided to hit the gym around 11. We went to the whirlpool then to the Sauna then steam room then play around at the pool... it was our first time to go together swimming! It was actually fun!

Hello there Blog!

2010-01-12T13:16:00.000-08:00

yup! I miss blogging...! like i really miss the times I used to write tons of blogs or at least one blog a day... I guess america is getting me real busy trying to make money for survival and no time to sit down and chit chat on my blog...

So far, this year is starting good... everything is going well... Been working my hours then some overtime... I worked for 11 days 12 hours shift! isn't it crazy? Well... I need to get something so might as well work hard for it...

Besides from work, love life is going good... sometimes he's being stubborn but I'm stubborn as well so we try to work it out lol. Never made efforts like this on my past but im loving it.

I have my four days off this week and I pretty much spent it with my bheb... Sunday, we visited rob and spent an hour with him and asked him hows life treating him over there. After that we went shopping @ westbrook and clinton then dinner at the chinese resto...

We bought the same shirt! lol for the first tme! hahahah so excited for our planned pictorial with bob but the weather is not very cooperative... news said it's gonna snow today but it didn't... Oh well winter is long so maybe next time we'll finally have a chance...

Still studying... i need to really do this but why can't I? lol I'm just so lazy... haiiizzz...
Been spending my days off SLEEPING... as in SLEEPING. both of us.

@ Work things are going crazy because besides the fact that work is getting busier and busier everyday there's a bunch of annoying people working there... People who don't mind their own business and keep their issues inside them. Gossips are crazy over there. Oh well I'm just worried about my friend about all of this, she can't really handle this kind of stress going on that's why it piss me off when people are trying to ruin everything and start making up stories. All i can do is try to support her and be at her side.

Overalll, life is life. bad things happen and you just have to try to hang on and do your best and always ask guidance from God in EVERY decision you make...

welcome 2010! (a late blog entry)

2010-01-06T14:06:00.000-08:00

Wow another year has passed,
The highlight of my year? hmmmm what could it be?
a lot of things happened that i never imagined to even happen in my life, taste of failure and success... lost some people whom i valued and met new people that became a big part of my life for the past year...

First quarter of the month last year went so smooth, i got all the things that I wanted and bust my butt working to get it. Started the year going to review classes and all that stuff...

Second quarter was all work plus the not so effective studying that I did... really got so confident and didn't paid attention to things that i needed to be concentrating to...

Third quarter was chaos... failure. betrayal. Drama. Deception. heartache... but after all that? I learned a lot of lesson. Lessons that lead me to be very careful in every decision I make in my life...

Last quarter was fun.. get to have a sweet vacation.. New found love... Hope and forgiveness... There's some down part but not enough to end my year in vain or sadness..

I have so much to be thankful for to God... for all the blessings that he gave me... for a good life that I have right now... for giving me the people that bring about happiness and good memories. For true friendship, healthy family and for my Love... <3

I'm hoping for a better year... more happiness and contentment... Keep my family healthy and strong... and hopefully offer me my most awaited success... :-)

Crazy study habit

2009-12-15T04:22:00.000-08:00

I went to starbucks this morning to grab some coffee and bread for breakfast after dropping off my bheb at work... I look around and ask the barista if they have a wifi connection and she said i need to pay for it so I went to starbucks site and registered. I was thinking about reviewing there since it's a little quiet and it feels different so time pass by after 1 and half hour of sitting there i didn't accomplish anything so i decided to go to a library nearby which is my first plan anyway. So Ive been here @ the library around 10: 30 am. and now it's already 12:03 pm.

Did i study for the past hour and half? nope. i can't focus. everytime i try to start some ideas go to mind like, Oh im going to see this site, oh im going to check my facebook again, oh i forgot to buy a gift for this person, go window shopping online... now its almost time to eat then i need to go grab something to eat coz i can't simply focus with my stomach empty!

I just can't focus. :-( psychological?? same college days study habits. i can't study without cleaning up my room doing laundry or doing some crafts by the time i feel ready its almost time to sleep or im already too tired to study...

are you experiencing the same thing? i just need to push myself to sit and start doing it!!! Maybe I'm just too anxious that I'm afraid to start... it's really crazy and waste of time. Now instead of starting off with my book here I am blogging my thoughts and going gaga with everything!

Oh well... I know I'm going crazy...

So much to be thankful for!

2009-11-24T14:29:00.000-08:00

Life is really good even everything is not yet perfect I'm still thankful about a lot of stuff. I don't have everything I want in the world but at least it motivates me to do my best to get what I want and specially what I need...

I'm thankful that I have my family even though I'm so far away from them I can still feel the love and care... to my dearest relatives here that's been supporting me all the time! My few but trusted friends... :-) co-workers that turned out to be a family and instant sister lol. My big bro and his family that helped me a lot and makes me feel important to their lives... My online friends that I have never talked to in person before but thanks to facebook i get to know them and actually get close to them in some way... My bheb for making me feel happy, sad, excited, mad, feel special and most importantly feel loved :-)

Thanksgiving is days away so I'm taking this oppurtunity to thank God for everything that he has given me and for everything that makes my life great.

I definitely don't have a perfect life but i really appreciate everything that I have and for who I have become...

I'm still fulfilling my plans and taking one step at a time.I'll get at the top of my dreams someday.. I just have to live each day and make it happen :-) like everyone does.

Oh well, feeling good today so might as well blog it.

I really need to update my blog everyday like I used to... a perfect output of my everyday life...

Drama

2009-11-19T12:20:00.000-08:00

yep it's been a whillllllllllllllleeeee since i wrote a blog.. omg. I used to love writing blogs like everyday and it helped me get through each day.

Today i really needed an output for everything that's going on. I'm a very happy person and things like sadness and depression doesn't always bother me because i can always make myself happy in any way (that sounded really weird). It's not like im crazy or whatever lol.

So this is one of those days that hits me real hard and make me feel like "hey, I'm ALONE." I realized that yes I'm really alone. Don't get me wrong i appreciate my relatives, brother, cousins and Aunt who's helping me out right now and super appreciate it...

But my MOM and lil bro... my friends back home... damn i miss those times. I miss how a heartbreak can be easily get over with. You won't feel that much pain because your friends are there to tap your back and say "Everything's gonna be alright" as if they know exactly what to say to make you feel better...

I got few real friends out here and my cousins that i could talk. My boyfriend is inlove with his xbox so forget about it.

Life is tough now but I can't stop right now. I can't stop loving. I can't stop believing and I can't stop hoping that everything's gonna be alright...

So far... I got my driving license and aiming for a car. One step at a time...

My side of story... PART 3

2009-08-31T15:39:00.000-07:00

It took me a while to make the third part since I was too busy working and all other stuffs that's going on with my life...

So this new guy treated me nicely and we agreed that we'll just remain friends and just be happy. and I BELIEVED HIM. So i was going out with my friends, going out to movies and such and this guy made me believe it was just okay but after I leave the house, he cries in front of my cousins and make it look like he's the poor one left behind...

I was shocked one evening I went home from movies and my cousin in law approached me about how I'm treating him, and I was like, huh? what are you talking about? she said he cried when he found out I went with the movies with a guy friend back then.. OH COME ON. REALLY? dude you just knew me for a 2 weeks.. seriously? I got really annoyed with all the BS that's going on.

Another Chance. After not talking to him for a day he started to approach me again and here I go again believe and trust him like nothing happened. Made chores for me even if I didnt asked him to do so.. pretty good huh?

I wake up early to do all the morning household chores so i can sleep and well relaxed at night not realizing he's pretty smart to do the night shift dishes to make it look he did all the work in the house. Nice one. I hope i realized that sooner.

He asked me on the movie then made me paid for it. Good job. That was not supposed to be a big deal then after the movie got mad at me or acted up for some reason can't remember what then throw the money in the floor telling me that the payment for what i spent in the movie. Wow. You are very nice. I hate when you make favors for people then throw it back in your face just to make it look like they don't owe you anything. What if i don't have money that night and actually went out with him. Damn that would be embarrassing. DON"T ASKED ANYBODY OUT IF YOU CAN"T TAKE CARE OF IT. LET THEM ASKED YOU OUT INSTEAD.

but he was still the angel for them of course. He can really fool you with the innocent face.

a lot of lies went on and on. I was trying to make him realize he can be himself and just tell me the truth about everything that happened to him in the past anyway I don't really like making friends or getting close to someone who can't be themselves. If you don't have money, car or anything tell me you don't have one because you didn't worked and looked out for ur kids not because ur Ex spent all ur money and put you in a big debt. When in fact she was the one who's working afterall and paying all your bills. That's her car and not urs. How can you even pretend and lie in my face and think that im stupid not to figure out what's going on?

Well, it hurts that I have trusted you and tried to help you be urself and not be someone else you think you are.

Cousin in law and everybody pitty him from all the drama he got in the past and what's happening with us.She wants me for him and I simply don't like him but my big fault was fool around and make jokes about his feelings. How can you love a person who doesn't even love himself.

I was already inlove with someone before I met him and it was hard to shift the feelings but i tried and slowly giving him chances but he made it even harder when i finally saw all the bad sides. Temper tantrums. Attitudes in inappropriate places where you're supposed to have fun. Definitely a turnoff.

I was really the bad girl. Maybe I was or should i say I am. My biggest fault was telling him there's nothing more i can give but staying the same person I am to him everyday. Like you're not trying to make him fall but you have no choice but to be nice because he was doing favors and you feel guilty about it? That was my fault. I was weak.

Then cousin in law made a Big deal out of it. Then all the issues came out one by one... I didn't even imagined all those stuffs really mattered. But I was very surprised with the outburst of feelings she kept many months ago...

My side of story... PART 2

2009-08-18T14:41:00.000-07:00

It all started when this "GUY" moved in my cousin's house let's name him M. He's not related to my cousin in law but since she love adopting people he adopted him coz he got a lot of troubles back where he belong. M's brother live for a couple of weeks first but moved out as soon as he got a job in NJ and mousse went into the scene after we met at his bro's birthday party...

Bare with me coz i want as much details as I could give so to lessen confusion in my story.

M was really nice and started to court and all that stuff. I was pretty much happy to have him around at the moment coz he reminds me of the ex pretty much.

All was good... Like maybe this guy could really be the one since we have the same culture and no more further adjustments on that part... I showed kindness and sweetness in return of all the efforts. Preparing breakfast, cooking lunch and even help me out with my laundry lol. As time goes by little by little I saw the bad side...

Very jealous. Assuming and had a very suspicious personality like all of his statements and stories are very inconsistent... so i decided to talk to him about it and actually we agreed to just remain friends but he asked me to be the same and still be sweet so it wasnt a problem to me and i said that's fine...

to be continued...

My side of story... PART 1

2009-08-17T03:57:00.000-07:00

there's always two sides of every story. This is my version.

Part 1...

I came here in US without any idea what am I getting myself into I just know i needed to work for a lil bit til the airforce gets me. I came here and got into a lot of issues with my relatives and I just don't want to be into any trouble and I chose what i thought was the best for me so I chose to live with my cousin and cousin in law instead of living with my closest relatives.

I was literally amazed how great she was towards me. As in i can't believe there's a kind of person like that very giving and very helpful and pretty much spoiled me with things and attention and helped me the best way she could. I was very thankful and always prayed that God may shower her endless blessings.

I'm pretty much a really bad Girl like i did a lot of stuffs, lots of adventures when I was still in the philippines then I changed myself when I got here. Stopped smoking, stayed home for months and just work work work and shop til i drop.

That was my problem. Shopping. pretty much got addicted to it and didn't think about the money i was spending. The best part was i bought all the gadgets that I wanted with all the hardwork. Payed for my Exams on my own and still sends money to my Mom.

Happy go lucky but really worked hard for the money.

Till she told people i needed to give some rent since I can already shop and im done paying my exams and review stuffs. Well she have a point but i got upset for not telling me first about it and rather told my friends first. It's like making me look bad.

But that was the past we talked about it and got over it. Pretty much she didn't asked for much and I gave her what she asked for and sometimes more than that.

Then time came that I met new friends. Went out a lot of times but still haven't forgotten my chores at home. Babysitting some cleaning but i don't really cook so i have a excuse for that.

Till things get really complicated....

Addicted to facebook :-)

2009-07-31T14:34:00.000-07:00

what makes my life everyday? FACEBOOK.

i don't even know why... maybe because it's the easiest way to get communication to my friends back in the philippines or simply because it's fun to actually have one place where you can reach your friends better than friendster can do. I don't even play any games on facebook.

Friendster got lots of spam which sometimes or most of the time comes from viruses and not even the real person sending you those nasty comments even messages. I don't know why until now they haven't fixed it yet.

Even myspace is too crowded. lots of people invite you just for them to have lots of friend counts and asks you to make fan signs for them. Really? do i even know you??

Lots of those glitter graphics thing which i hate the most. It's not that im being mean but seriously do you really have to put super big comment signs on my page just to say ur dropping by? I appreciate the effort but a simple "hi" or how are you? will be much appreciated ^_^

Especially, if you hate somebody so much does it really satisfy you to post vulgar words and post it 5 times not even sure if ur enemy will read it or you just seek attention. Whatever ur reasons are. Stop hating and don't use vulgar words coz we can see 9 years old kids or even younger who does have friendster or whatever accounts which is really alarming.

In facebook, there's no viruses (not that i know of) and no fancy profiles that slows down ur computer..

Anyways. just my thought for today. hahah too much talking.

When You expect it to be good it turns out to be the opposite.

2009-07-28T19:41:00.000-07:00

Okay pretty much same shit everyday... I watched Harry Potter today and it wasn't what I expected. I don't wanna spoil it or what but really???? Dumbledore died just like that? oh well. I hope he'll be alive on the next one and it was just a planned death or maybe he just ordered snape to do that since he never even fought for himself. Maybe it was part of the plan?

I watched all the harry potter but i totally don't remember everything or even the right order from the first one to the recent but yeah whatever.

An ordinary day today, did my chores in the morning and went sunbathing with the kids at the backyard. lol. pretty much i spent my day off relaxing and spent time with the family.

Now i don't even wanna go back to work.. :(

I have to go back reviewing since I stopped for a little bit... i really need to get back to that since I'm really running out of time and my application will pretty soon expired >.<

I miss somebody today. He's almost a bestfriend to me but I guess he's not yet ready to be one towards me. I wished we just remained friends and didn't try anything more than that and maybe until now we're still good friends... :-(

Oh well I'm just blogging coz i can't sleep... slept like 3 hours earlier afternoon so I'm so awake right now... TTYL.

Love is like a rollercoaster; it has ups and downs, twists and turns, but when you get of, you always want to get back on.

2009-07-26T15:24:00.000-07:00

The family planned an outing going to hershey park at Pennsylvania but I was thinking not to come with them since they're leaving at friday noon and I have work til saturday but at work I realized that it's like a one time experience to actually travel with thefamily and have fun once in a while. So i decided to come with them but the dilemma was they already left the house and I need to go to NY by my own since we're staying overnight so we can leave in the morning to go to PA.

I traveled alone riding a train FOR THE FIRST TIME. I mean I experience it before wth LRTs in the Philippines but this time here in US is a lil bit scary for me which is Ironic. haha. It was almost 3 hours travel and 1 stop over. I had fun.

I hate when i have quiet moments because it makes me think about lots of stuffs in my mind. It's like a never ending problem solving time when I'm alone and it's like quiet.

So i arrived safe and the next day we went to hershey park. i think it was a 3hours travel.

I had fun there since i had the chance to ride some of the most scariest one. I realized if I'm with someone brave with me to ride it i feel brave too and for the first time i really had the best of my time in a rollercoaster.

My favorite was the black bear, the rail was on the head part so ur feet is hanging and we chose to ride in the very front so we actually see everything. it was fun. the best feeling i ever had. it's like u were flying.

I hate the water ride. The roller soaker. its not that its not fun. It's fun but the line sucks! we never thought it would take that long. it took 3 hours for us to actually get in to the ride and the whole time my eyes were closed! hahah i got scared coz i don't really feel secured with the lock it feels like im gonna fall any moment.

I can say i had really overcome my fears on roller coaster rides! hahah good for me, lol but hope my summer fun will not end here!

People sometimes don't make sense

2009-07-21T14:51:00.000-07:00

Talking about Love...

Everything seems not right. You love him. He's not sure if he loves you. The other loves you truly but you don't know if you love him and the last thing that complicates everything is you left somebody waiting in a far away land that believes in the love story you made up because of your selfishness.

I was happy i fell in love again and actually got hurt after almost a year of being here. The love story didn't went good since it started like a game for both of us. Well.. I paid the price of actually lying about everything just to have what I want and when I want something I want it bad. I don't care who gets hurt in the way. That's the side of me that I want to change. But change is hard when you're actually used to be that way for 21years.

Well I'm sorry if we have to end this way. I'm not supposed to be your drama that you tell everybody and tell the whole world how many times I've hurt you. I'm not fair but so are you.

Talking about life...

Am I making sense? actually I don't understand anything that's happening. I'm actually in the lowest point in my life right now (that's what they're trying to make me think) but im surprised that I'm still happy. Lowest in a way. I don't have a very good job yet but at least I have one (something to be thank for). I don't have any car to bring me wherever I go. I can do limited stuffs and have limited freedom.

People who you think would understand you don't even understand you at all. They think they're right because that's the norm and that's what they believe life is supposed to be.
I'm not going to rush myself anymore. If i feel ready i will be ready.

I'm having fun dealing with some struggles of my life everyday. It sucks that you have to obey people's rules because you owe them a big part of you but I'm very thankful that God gave me these people. I'm just stubborn sometimes but this is who I am and this is my life atl least give me the power to decide for my self.

If you give me advice. I'll appreciate it but i think it's not fair to get mad when I don't follow it because it's not an advice but rather a command. To be fair i'll be in silence rather than defend my side because no one and nobody will even understand.

9 months

2009-03-24T04:52:00.000-07:00

It's been a while! yeahhhh! hahahah I've been very busy with work and life and take note not reviewing for anything! i feel so damn lazy can anyone try to motivate me? I'm starting to be contented with what I have in my life but I know this is not supposed to be the contentment part and I should make more efforts! hahahah...
I'm just happy. New friends. 9 months would you believe? 9 months and more months/years to come...

Sometimes i don't feel like going home anymore. Am i having fun here? a little bit. It's like i don't have any reasons anymore to go home. My friends are nowhere in sight. Busy as hell with their careers. My family? I don't even know if I still have one. It's a crazy life but I have to deal with it. Mahal? hmmm will you still love me?

The bright side? I was able to know the people here more. Somewhat not scared anymore to actually make friends and learn how to actually cope up with their attitudes but still preserving the filipina values I have (oha oha).

Life as a 21 year old is a very exciting part here in US unlike in our country it's like u have to prepare urself in a certain level of maturity for you are starting a more serious life and the pressure of being mature!

I started night life when I was 14 til before I left Philippines but not as much. Before i left I felt I was getting old because bars are populated by teenagers aging 14 to 18. Gemoy and I usually asks oursleves are we that OLD to feel that we don't belong anymore in this club? hahahaha

When I got here, it was a big change. I felt I was back to my teenage life just starting to explore the world. Turning 21 is a big issue. and New culture and stuffs like that, and you have to deal with it.

But life became a boring cycle as soon as I started working. Oh well it's up to me to make it a little bit worth living right? I'll only be 21 once so why not have fun?

A poem

2009-03-08T15:17:00.000-07:00

My feelings of loving you,
My feelings of wanting you,
My feelings of needing you,
When I look at the sky,
and I wonder why,
It had to be YOU.

Prodigal Daughter

2009-03-08T15:13:00.000-07:00

I was so stupid to tell her bad things and not recognizing all the efforts she made to make my life worth living. and for my existence I owe it partly to her but still made her feel that all of that is not enough to forgive her weakness. This is the time that she needs me the most and I didn't even try to understand her side. Am I that bad? I just realized things will go wrong sometimes but even a single reason to make things better will be very helpful. Now I can't bring those words back I already made a deep scratch in her heart and Lord I'm sorry. That is never acceptable and it's not gonna be. I hope things will be better. Better everyday.

Me. and the very unexpected problem.

2009-03-01T05:57:00.000-08:00

I never thought this can happen to me or even imagined I will encounter this problem. It hurts so bad when the people you love the most are the one who's getting hurt. I can't do anything but support whatever decision they make. I thought these things only happens in movies or drama series. I don't expect things will happen this way. Maybe in some way this happened because I was not with them. or I don't even know If I could prevented it from happening. All I know is she's hurting so bad and I'm not there to understand why it happened. I'm so far thinking everything's okay back home not thinking of the bad things that may happen. I can't say exactly what happen to you guys. Maybe this is just one thing I'll keep to myself. The only thing I can share with you guys is that I feel so bad and I don't even know what to do or what to feel. She said it's okay. It's not OKAY and it's never OKAY.

I don't know why people get so blinded by love that they don't realize how wrong things are. I loved a person so much before that I, myself experienced the same thing but I didn't realized that it will double the pain if the one who's experiencing is the person you love.

Lord, I'm Sorry.

2009-02-20T14:25:00.000-08:00

This is not my usual everyday blog would talk about but yeah I remember when I was still a child I was very religious (Lol) and I always attend mass every sunday or saturday maybe because we live like 7 houses from Church. Read the Novena, Joined the choir (lol haha bata pko nun eh) always attend different events like "Flores De Mayo" which my cousin got her scar on the hand because we're playing "tag" inside the church, it was break time from our bible study and I accidentaly hit the big pot of very hot arrozcaldo towards gemoy and she burned her hand. (SORRY GEMOY!)

A lot of stuffs. My mind was so pure hahah lol and It's funny because sometimes you want to attend the mass because you have a new dress and you want to wear them. I am considered lucky to know God and His presence in my early age. Nowadays, I know a lot of kids that they don't even know who is Papa Jesus... and these kids are Baptised Catholics/Christians.

I am thankful and I will always be thankful for everything.

I've been here for 6 months and I never had the chance to go to a mass. (Once, but that was Uncle Tim's Burial) or maybe I am too busy of much less important things that I didn't even bother to make time. Hope I could get a chance next Sunday and I hope my sunday review won't start that day. Yeah... Bad very Bad... T_T

The Addiction To Online Shopping: I WORK HARD Therefore I SHOP HARD!

2009-02-15T13:26:00.000-08:00

I was cleaning my room earlier today to get rid of those things in my room that I don't need and I planned to buy a new comforter since I got tired of washing this big comforter every now and then so I have other choices hahaha and I got tired of the old design lol I want something new. But unfortunately the mall closed early today so we just ate snack and had coffee at panera bread, had a little shopping then went home. Okay so back to cleaning... I was reaching something at the top of my cabinet then when I pulled this paper bag hanging oh my gosh,, all those Boxes fell! I didn't realize it was that much hahahah! i used to clean it before and those boxes keep on falling and sometimes I hide them on the other room! hahaha

Ate mhel knows how I got addicted to this online shopping thing... so she always remind me to save... but since there's no time to go to mall sometimes what temps me is when I go to this online stores and when they notify me through emails that they have 80% sale or whatever... damn cant help myself! especially when the things I want is what on sale.

That's why until now I can't buy the laptop that I want because I keep on spending and spending and spending... and when I tried to arranged the clothes in my cabinet... almost all of my dress and clothes still got tags on them... why? I can't wear them haaha it's like the event should be very special before I would wear them. Crazy huh?

"Naku, 6 months k palang d2 andami n ng box n yan." Everytime those boxes arrived ate mhel always tells me.. "AKALA KO BA LAST NA YUN? BAKIT MERON NANAMAN?" hahahah well.

Maybe that's because that's the only super flash happiness I can get. I mean yeah... it gives you happiness for a moment but sometimes when you dont have someone to share it with it's like after all the spending it's not worth it? but I still do it. It makes me think of working more harder...

but now I need to slow down.. it's too much.. I don't have the right yet to spend and spend hahaha lol... well I'll try to! but I will not promise anything...

Meet "PUSO"

2009-02-15T12:31:00.000-08:00

This is a very special Valentines Gift that I received (note: I appreciate all the gift and efforts). The Gift of Life! hehehe I never took care of any plant before and I'm scared to mess up with this one. My kuya got Green Thumb but I don't know yet if I have that kind of Gift. It's an ANTHURIUM can also be called "Flamingo Flower" or "Boy Flower". My kuya Mike gave it to me. I don't know but this is a very unexpected gift and I like it! I mean instead receiving dead roses... hehehe

Well I'll try my best to take good care of this one...

BTW...

Bob is leaving me for a couple of days or weeks, He needs to be fixed because the lens keeps on falling I don't know why... so I called Nikon tech support and they told me to bring my camera to where I bought it but Circuit City is closing so there I need to mail bob back to Nikon for them to fix him T_T... Sounds crazy but yeah i treat this gadgets of mine as treasures and they are my only pleasure (it rhymes). So yeah. but after the hockey game! hehehe So far so good...

Now I'm one step closer.

2009-02-10T15:38:00.000-08:00

I really need to start focusing on my studies and read or much better finish my books... damn. I don't know why I feel so lazy and I don't know where to start...

Today I went to my make up class, and it was fun! I mean the instructor is really nice and compared to the previous one I can see the effort she's making to help us understand the concepts that she's trying to show. She made me introduced myself and so I did, I was surprised to myself that I was able to stand up and actually talk in front without feeling nervous or what hahah... everybody was nice.

One thing I noticed with the class is they tend to question the question. I mean yeah if you know something might as well say something about it but these practice questions that they're showing us undergo a lot of research and instead of questioning the credibility why not just find the reason why the ANSWER is the ANSWER.

I guess my advantage was I started this slight review of mine months ago, where I experienced the same thing like I was wondering why that is the answer when it's not even connected hahaha NCLEX is really crazy and you really need to look deeply and understand the choices.

I know i don't have the right yet to advice about this NCLEX thing but to my fellow batchmates or nursing students who are planning to take the NCLEX, might as well start reading your books now, and I recommend that you read the KAPLAN STRATEGIES then SAUNDERS BOOKS. Perfect combination.

To those who just graduated and just took the board. Start applying for ur NCLEX now if you're planning to go here and don't take a break yet... ^_^

ciaO!

Foxwoods Galore

2009-02-08T14:35:00.000-08:00

hahaha lol okay so it's not my first time to go into a casino but definitely FOXWOODS is a different one. It's so huge and elegant and all the people were nice. I don't have any plans of going out last night besides attending my niece's bday party but since sonia is telling and begging me to go with them so why not? hahah what's the four days off for... so then I prepared and all that stuff... I was thinking if I'm gonna bring Bob (my camera) with me since I got this phobia of bringing my gadg with me coz I might lose it or something like that but I still brought it with me lol.

So there set up and everything... I chose 1 from 6 pairs of clothes to wear but thanks to my dear ate mhel and I had the right one for that night hahaha... sonia and her Hubby picked me up around 9 pm then went to pick up noel and finally straight to casino!

We decided to go clubbing first and then when everybody was holding their precious IDs I realized I'm not bringing one! hahahaha damn! we drove like 45 mins and there's no way we're going back just to get that ID so I borrowed my friend's ID hahahaha ssshhhh ! I was so freakin nervous! but then they let me go inside but definitely not with bob! hahaha so there I passed Bob to sonia's hubby since he'll go back to the car and get a new pants because they won't let him in because of the cargo pants. I didn't notice I dropped my Lens camera so there after all the clubbing and happenings. when sonia's hubby went back I saw him carrying my camera but it doesn't have it lens! waaaaaaa I was so nervous and I panic my gaaadd i just lost my phone and now what! i was walking around the casino with my boots unzipped hahaha because I was rushing to talked to somebody who work there to check if they have it on Lost and found!

Fortunately, Bob's lens was there! Thank God!

I didn't gamble or what ahhahaha lol I can't... I don't know but I should have tried to but I was so lazy last night! hahaha

Went home around 7 am whahah lol evrything's perfect and I did enjoy the clubbing moment... it's been a while!

i lost my phone...

2009-02-01T09:10:00.000-08:00

Well this is the only memory left. I know it's my fault but it is just a material thing anyway which you can be able to buy again rather than losing people you love ayt? hahah a lot of worst things can happen but yeah I still consider my self lucky but very very irresponsible... hmmmp... well it already happened...

I was having my lunch at friendly's near Kaplan center then i paid the bill and took off to get a coffee at starbucks... I was so excited and I know I'm a person who forget a lot of things and I was thinking about my ipod then I totally forgot about my cp... when I came back to my review center I was gonna check my phone if there's any messages but then I cant find it in my bag so I tried to call it with my classmate's phone and there it is gone.. only my voicemail is answering me... well... I'm trying to call tmobile to lock it so who ever found it will not be able to use it... but let's see what's gonna happen...

Take note i didn't bought the insurance which I should have bought it because I'm not much of a good user so then again sorry for me...

Dramatic Pinay

2009-01-31T14:21:00.000-08:00

Do you sometimes feel the same thing like deep sadness come rushing to your heart like you just want to cry and let it out? Well here it goes again and again... this thing happens to me like every 2 months... depression attack or should I say "missing my family" attack haha... I was reading some pages of my books when I suddenly heard someone calling me from downstairs, exactly the way how my MOm would call me... "cheng" i heard it three times... the first one gave me the impression that my mom was actually calling me but after a couple of milliseconds i realized i was not with them and there's no way that my mom would be here... then everything cleared up... My aunt was calling somebody and she was calling "beng" or what other name...

Now that hit me so bad.. i mean I really miss the way how things go in our house everyday... how my mom would check up on me if I was already home... or when I hear my lil brother open the door coming home from school or when my stepfather would stompt his feet before entering the house to remove the dirt in his shoes. I miss every detail...

I miss how I stay in bed sleeping for 16 hours and my mom will knock on my door saying... "cheng are you still alive?" hahaha well those were the days...

America will make you feel old. It gives you a routine that it's hard for you to get out from it... (This is just my opinion okay?). I love the things that it gives me. I love the pleasures but the pleasures are quick. Not everything is easy here... as most of my old fellow countrymen would think. I love the surroundings but i hate the fact that I can't even share it with people i love.. maybe not for now. I love how the season change, it gives you a lot of new beginnings... i hate the fact that I don't know how to start changing everything...

I'm still lucky, Lucky to have a simple life and having these important people around me and still have reasons to come back home...

6 months and counting

2009-01-26T14:07:00.000-08:00

I WANT TO WRITE A BLOG BUT I DON"T KNOW HOW TO START... hahahahha well I guess that's a start...Maybe I'll just list some of my random thoughts for today...

1. I need to enroll to a BLS program
2. Another Decision to make... actually its already made... hahaha
3. I'm scared to Die.
4. Will my boobs get bigger if I got pregnant? ahahhaha
5. I miss everyone back home.

I'm having a lot of fun in youtube lately hahha lots of interesting video blogs lol.

My New Toy

2009-01-23T13:48:00.000-08:00

weeeee! I completed the set.. not really but ALMOST ahahaha... wheeewwww.... at least it's something that I really worked hard for... supposed to be a laptop but i decided to get this one first so I can take a lot of nice pictures in my niece birthday! I'll be the photographer in charge... LOL

Obviously I don't know how to use it yet but eventually there's gonna be progress hahaha... a new phone and my new camera.. all the overtime is worth it... hahahah

Well I'll spend a lot on gadgets rather than clothes... the sad thing is I don't have my mahal or my friends to share the happiness with... it's really a lot more different before... but yeah.. another blessing...

mY bOOKS FIRST...! Review Review Review.. ayt!

Yoga Craze

2009-01-21T13:17:00.000-08:00

okay for the first time i tried something new, Yesterday I went to work for overtime but went home early because there's no work that morning so I decided to go home and do something else instead... hhaha then I saw the Wii Fit so I said why not try? hahaha the kids are not there so nobody's gonna bother me... hahahaha

So i tried a lot of different stuffs hahaha but I focused more on balance games because i think that's my weakness... the Yoga thing is really cool haha but the bad part is, i didn't had any warm up at all... so this morning when I woke up all my muscles hurt so bad! as in! waaaaaa...

well bye bye for now...